British Gas: ‘It was the cold weather what did it – honest, guv’.

27 February 2013

British Gas has announced an 11% rise in profits in winter 2012, and it has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that they put the prices up just before Christmas.

Despite the fact that most of us can barely afford a pot to piss in, British Gas made £606m out of domestic households last year, which they attribute to freezing temperatures and increased demand. Oh yeah, and er, British Gas also raised electricity prices by 6% in November.

Centrica, which owns British Gas, reported a profit of £2.7bn for 2012, up 14% from last year.

But Sam Laidlaw, Centrica’s chief executive, stressed it was "lower than any of our competitors" - as he ate caviar out of the belly button of a concubine.

USwitch spokeswoman Ann Robinson (no, not that one) said: "Seven out of 10 of us actually went without heating at some point during this winter and over a third of us have reported that we feel it's actually affected the quality of our life and also our health. I think customers will be wondering why on earth British Gas had to take this move in November when they are making such high profits."

But it wasn’t just British Gas who put up prices. Let’s wrap ourselves in hypothermia blankets and take a look at this graph (as nicked from the BBC), shall we? Hmm. Perhaps we could heat our hovels using sheer, unadulterated ANGER?


  • jim
    screw all the energy companies. screw them in the ear.
  • Captain W.
    Finger them like cats
  • JonB
    "Seven out of 10 of us actually went without heating at some point during this winter" That sounds like a life-style choice. Whether you go with or without heating depends on your priorities, surely. My priority is to have a warm house so I will cut back on other things to make sure I can afford it.
  • Sicknote
    Lovely lovely lovely - I can't wait for the divvy to be paid out to me; keep complaining you fucking halfwits
  • Wilko
    My bills have gone up by £40 a month over the past year. To put that into perspective, it doesn't take a lot of cutting back to cover that rise. I certainly wouldn't be turning my heating down or off. I'd maybe have one less meal out every month, or drink one less bottle of wine a week, hardly a life changer. The majority of the working public should easily be able to cover these rises without whining and moaning. Yes, it's unfair, but fuck me, your 7 out of 10 going without heat is clearly utter bollocks.
  • grandma
    My income barely covers the basics. Not much I can cut back on to give my money to the energy companies. Guess I'll just have to stay cold.
  • Mike O.
    Someone somewhere behind these energy companies must be laughing their cock off at how utterly powerless the UK punters are at doing anything about these obscene prices. 30% rises over 3 years, has the price of wholesale gas gone up the same amount in this time? Has it f**k.

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