Amazon reviews prove idiots have a point of view, too

7 May 2009

The problem with equal rights is that everyone gets them, even the stupid people. The vote, jobs, even sex - is there anything more infuriating than spotting a buffoon with a hot girlfriend? Surely there should be some sort of spelling test before they get a pop at the yankee doodle.

Idiots even have their say on the greatest works of literature and cinematography. Cynical-C is in the business of scouring customer reviews on Amazon, and hunting down the one-star ratings of iconic books and movies.

To be fair, some of the reviews are bang on the money; others, less so:

This Is Spinal Tap

If you’re going to make such an excellent documentary, why make it about about a band that nobody has ever heard of?

Getting similar behind-the-scenes footage on the Who, The Stones, or Genesis would have been a monumental achievement in documentary cinema.

Homer's The Odyssey

This book sucks. I dont care if Homer was blind or not this book is like 900 pages too long. I could tell this story in about 10 pages. Homer taking all long to say stupid stuff.

Schindler's List

Hey don’t get me wrong I like Holocaust movies as much as the next guy , but this one was a real let down. First of all there are no Americans(at least not American characters)hey spielzy what gives, wheres are hero, schindler is no indiana jones. Perhaps he should of handed the script over to michael cricton.I think spielberg is our greatest “dreamweaver”, to quote someone else, but this film has no pizazz, or more importantly no color. plus it doesn’t have any great action scenes or excitement like saving private ryan. I guess the holocaust is a good topic to make a movie about, but brother this movie aint no “hook”. hopefully people will forget about this turkey and pay more attention to stephen’s better work, ‘amistad’ ‘field of dreams’ ‘ the lost world’.

The Beatles - Abbey Road

Come Together sounds fake, and everything else is tired. Who would buy this when you have Pink? Get her new album instead.

The Beatles - The White Album

These old talentless hags will never be as great as their idols Oasis! Oasis are one of the best “classic rock” bands ever, aside from Metallica. This whole album is boring and uninspired with weak songwriting. All of the songs sound the same!

Good Fellas

Deserves an X rating for all of the gratuitous violence. Little to offer to a Christian-based viewer who ascribes to humanist values.


TOPICS:   TV   Consumer Advice


  • dude
    LoL @ all the comments except the last one. I thought that comment really is a right to speech comment? Surely thats leaving a personal opinion? Either way thanks bitterwallet team for wasting my 30 secs. Im glad you obviously wasted some of your precious life on this shit? You are unfufilled in some respect? Are you perhaps failed doctors/pilots/dentists/dustbin men ????
  • acecatcher3
    this isnt related to this article but can i ask why on hukd one of ur articles is "bitterwallet" where it just links to this site.....the top of the box already doesnt that, remove that one and allow another article to be seen, surely thats better??
  • scribbles
    Yeah, Goodfellas is the perfect choice of evening viewing for the zealot at heart. Maybe followed up by a mignight showing of Hostel? Twat.
  • scribbles
    I must admit that Schindler would have been better played by Vin Diesel. Then he could have kicked the nazi's asses and rode off on a Harley at the end credits. Twat.
  • Graham N.
    Homer’s The Odyssey I got to page 457 and Bart was not mentioned once.
  • Mike H.
    Quite frankly, I think Good Fellas are shit, they taste crap and there's hardly any topping! when there is it's 'strewn' randomly accross the top and I have to friggin rearrange it so I get a bit of everything in one bite, call that a thick crust? cheaper at TESCO's BTW peeps.
  • David
    And who says the Americans "don't do irony". That Schindler's List one has got to be tongue in cheek. I wish I'd thought of posting a review like that; it's hilarious! Lighten up guys, he's got you good!
  • Geoff J.
    Quite possibly one of the best posts to date on Bitter Wallet
  • The B.
    Yeah seriously, most of those are dripping in sarcasm
  • Chrism
    I think the reply to this article goes something like this...... WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSSSSSSSH!
  • James R.
    Hey, don't be too hard on brainless morons. Without them who's gonna ask my kids " you want fries with that...?" OR who's going to clean the shit of the back of my toilet. I say hug an idiot today - without them the world would be fucked.
  • Another T.
    Title... This is my Excerpt...
  • Ralpho
    Posted by James RW  May 8, 2009 at 1:45 pm "Hey, don’t be too hard on brainless morons. I say hug an idiot today.........." Come on, James RW!!! Let me give you a hug!! You brainless fucking moron!!!

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