Ryanair attempts to profit from the dead and the fat

29 April 2009

Only two days ago, Bitterwallet reader Mike read our post on the swine flu epidemic effect on the airline trade, and thought out loud:

Mike didn't have to wait long. While it's not a flight offer involving flying pigs, Ryanair chief executive Michael O'Leary has taken advantage of the deaths of many and infection of thousands to- wait, you've guessed already, haven't you?

Yes, O'Leary saw an opportunity at a press conference to make headlines and push his flights by saying something thoroughly outrageous - that it was only dirty foreigners that would die from swine flu:

"Are we going to die from swine flu? No. Are we in danger of SARS? No. Foot and mouth disease? No. Will it affect people flying short-haul flights around Europe this summer? Thankfully, no."

"It is a tragedy only for people living ... in slums in Asia or Mexico. But will the honeymoon couple from Edinburgh die? No. A couple of Strepsils will do the job."

Strepsils! Of course! If only the World Health Organization had been told! Or the 159 Mexicans confirmed dead! Or the 23 month-old baby who died this morning in a Texan slum. Er. Strepsils! It cures ball cancer too, for sure! Thank you, Doctor O' Leary!

Or maybe swine flu is a risk to anybody who enjoyed a holiday more adventurous than ordering the paella at Lineker's Bar in Magaluf. And maybe it's a tragedy with consequences that'll reach far beyond the individuals it kills. It's likely that if Ryanair flew to Mexico, O'Leary would have been more particular with his words. Still, they're only foreigners, so they don't count.

In other Ryanair news, if you're fat, you're fucked - it genuinely looks like Ryanair is going to try and sneak through a fat tax, because "passengers voted overwhelmingly" for one. No they didn't - you put up a poll your site and asked them to vote in return for a cash prize, you cockends. Nobody spontaneously formed a consumer union and demanded it, did they? Jesus.

TOPICS:   Travel


  • Robin
    I tried calling the Swine Flu hotline but couldn't hear a thing ...... there was too much crackling on the line. ...I'll get my coat...
  • ronnie
    I'm really worried about this Swine Flu. I'm off to the chemist for some oinkment.
  • pig g.
    i want to get swine flu. send me some in the post. if you get swine flu and die then you're gay
  • jon j.
    The World Health Organization have real made a pigs ear out of all this
  • Mike
    Cant they just allocate people seats based on waist size, who cares if there's fat people on your plain as long as you're not sitting next to them.
  • Bullet
    This swine flu has me really worried only last night I woke up in a sweat covered in RASH-ers
  • Porky
    I think I've got swine flu. I've come out in rashers.
  • brian
    Overheard a conversation on the train..............this woman said i think my husband has that swine flue.................her friend replied,is he at home in bed with a hot drink.............no she said,he is out...looking for truffles
  • rune
    welcome to the aporkalypse...
  • Mike H.
    The government are making a real pigs ear of this!
  • cooldudemark
    I think I might have swine flu i have come out in a rasher
  • montybum
    I tihnk I've got a swine flue. I woke up and had a rashers on my arm and back. pork rashers.
  • habeeb
    i don t have swi ne flu becuase i woek up and was rashers
  • Mike H.
    I think I might have swine flu, as I have the trott...ers...
  • James
    I think I might have swine flu, i am a pig
  • tits
    i hope micheal o leary gets swine flu. i'll happily cure his condition with strepsils.

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