Now publicity-hungry Ryanair are planning in-flight porn

8 November 2011

Bitterwallet - porn on your mobile You can just imagine the scenes in the boardroom at Ryanair HQ – the Sky Marshall wandering around throwing increasingly madcap ideas into the air, in the hope that one of them might seem plausible enough to actually propose in the public domain.

He’s taken it to the edge with the latest one – the idea of in-flight pornography. No, really (or not, as the case may be – we’re pretty sure it won’t happen).

The idea is simple – the airline will provide an in-flight web offer that copies the pay-TV services you get in certain hotels. If you’ve got a tablet computer or smartphone, you’ll be able to log in to a Ryanair app, opening up a world of entertainment, with gambling, games, movies and even hardcore bongo available to you. What an amazing technological development!

Sky Marshall O’Leary says: “I'm not talking about having it on screens on the back of seats for everyone to see. It would be on handheld devices. Hotels around the world have it, so why wouldn't we?” Erm, because minors could easily see it? Because it’s just fundamentally wrong?

What the Sky Marshall seems to have forgotten is that sussed travellers will probably already have their phones and tablets loaded with apps and entertainment of their own choosing, and they probably won’t be planning to watch porn.

Perhaps the real story is that Ryanair are planning to somehow block you from accessing the stuff that is already on your electronic device, charging you an ‘entertainment tax’ of £40 before allowing you to watch it during your flight?

Keep watching the skies, people…

TOPICS:   Travel

11 comments

  • Alexis
    They'll be a wanking charge next.
  • Marky M.
    Perhaps it's to encourage people to dash off to the bog, with the entry fee going up to ten euros. Or maybe the orange staff will offer "extras".
  • Dick
    I'd like 2 virtual scratchcards for a fiver please.
  • Dick
    I wonder what the next fake gimmick will be that they have no plans of rolling out, but want the free publicity. I reckon the next one will be having one double toilet, big enough to have sex in.
  • Idi A.
    @ Dick Or a bit of Skyrim?
  • The B.
    " If you’ve got a tablet computer or smartphone, you’ll be able to log in to a Ryanair app" That would be wirelessly then? On a plane? And they've obviously tested this? And cleared it with the CAA? More Ryanair made up BS, why do you print it all the time?
  • DragonChris
    Porn on handheld devices... in a public plane... unless they're going to provide "modesty blankets" (at a nominal fee, of course!) I can't see there being any point whatsoever - People won't be watching pornos for the storyline. Can't see this one taking off.
  • Goldfinger
    Mayeb the porn is just for the pilots? It ish very hot in zhe cabin, yesh?
  • callum
    The Real Bob - yes it has been tested... Many planes in the US for example have wifi. And rolling out wireless entertainment systems is the next big thing in aviation now the individual seat screens are more or less ubiquitous.
  • The B.
    callum - So you're saying that because it's been rolled out in the US that it's been approved by the CAA then?
  • The P.
    [...] bitter wallet:  Now publicity-hungry Ryanair are planning in-flight porn [...]

What do you think?

Connect with Facebook, Twitter, or just enter your email to sign in and comment.

Your comment