Let's all pile into the FirstGroup shop and go spending crazy!

17 August 2012

FG1000EX Now that FirstGroup are about to grasp control of the West Coast Mainline, perhaps it’s time that passengers started showing their loyalty to their new train overlords by stocking up on goods from the FirstGroup online shop.

A pack of 12 balloons can be had for only £5.21 while a pack of three golf balls, branded with the First logo, is just £13.31. If it rains while you’re on your round of golf, a First-branded umbrella is a mere £26.08.

Just don’t fork out on the First Group ‘trainers’ (pictured) – they’re not correct golfing attire and you’ll have wasted your £72.00…

(thanks to Twitter user @whoismatthew)

TOPICS:   Travel   High Street News

9 comments

  • tin
    Holy fuck...
  • Sicknote
    Clearly aimed at people who watch trains rather that suffer the crippling financial indignity of having to use them to get to work.
  • Spencer
    Only 72 quid? For trainers made of old bus seats? I don't want to live on this planet anymore.
  • Mancky
    Well you can't rely on First to get you off the planet, but with trainers like that the planet might leave you.
  • Steve
    In the spirit of due dilligence, let's examine the golf balls: - £13.31 is only about a 400% markup for the (shite) balls. Not only that, but they manage to mis-spell 2 letters out of a 6 letter brand name for the ball manufacturer. I bet their West Coast Main Line bid document was both a) a fuckin hoot and b) scarily true. "We will giv the guverment lots of cashbak 'cos we will but-fuk those inconvenient cattle wot wide on our twains."
  • Trollateriat
    Going to get one of the First branded tops, pop down to Crewe station and pretend to work for the fuckers - see what fun I can have.
  • Avon B.
    The trainers are, according to them, "selling like hotcakes" [sic]. So why don't they have a photo of the actual item, rather than that very poor Photoshop visual? Because they don't exist yet, because nobody is sad enough to have ordered any?
  • catweazle
    Posted by Avon Barksdale So why don’t they have a photo of the actual item, rather than that very poor Photoshop visual? Because they don’t exist yet, because nobody is sad enough to have ordered any? They'll probably turn up late, covered in shit and graffiti.
  • Spencer
    I swear on the lives of my children... I would rather be kicked in the nuts than wear ANY merchandise from this company. Seriously. Given the choice between wearing these old bus seat trainers... or a swift boot in the Johnson... I would genuinely take the nut busting....

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