Doctor suggests ‘pay as you weigh’ airline fees for lardy passengers
Doctors, well known for their kind and considerate attitude towards fatties, are now WEIGHING in on airline ticketing, saying that big people should pay more for airline seats because they require more fuel to transport them.
Dr Bharat P Bhatta, from an unpronounceable college in Norway, reckons that it’s a simple matter of physics. He says: ‘Charging according to weight and space is a universally accepted principle, not only in transportation, but also in other services. As weight and space are far more important in aviation than other modes of transport, airlines should take this into account when pricing their tickets.'
He then goes on to helpfully suggest that a person weighing 60kg should pay half the fare of a passenger weighing 120kg. So basically, if you’re a big chuffer, make sure you’ve got a big wallet, too.
Dr Ian Yeoman, from the exciting sounding Journal of Revenue and Pricing Management adds: ‘Maybe airlines should be looking into introducing scales at check in.’
Thanks, heartless doctors, for your input! We can’t wait to see all those suicidal, depressed obese people getting humiliated in the Ryanair fatty scales when we go on holiday!
So is this a matter of principle? Should heavy people should pay more on planes, while folks with featherlight arses jet around the world for song? Or should we show some humanity and pay up for everyone?