STFU, Grandpa – we’ve got Google now

If you’ve ever suspected that grandparents were obsolete human furniture who were always shouting at the telly and being a bit racist, today’s young scamps have proved you right.

Instead of asking their elder relatives for advice, 90% of youngsters would rather ask Grandpa Google, according to a rather witless survey by cleaning company Dr Beckmann.

According to 1,500 grandparents, only a third of them had been asked ‘what was it like when you were young?’ (Probably because they would actually TELL them). Similarly, practical tasks like sewing on buttons were left to internet searches, and 8 out of 10 grandparents felt that they had less contact with their children because of that bloody internet taking away our corner shops etc.

But perhaps grandparents should quit moaning and try to diversify, like everyone else. If they could tell their grandchildren where to find decent lolcats, answer questions like ‘why is my vagina look funny??!!111, and show them an exclusive Rihanna sex tape, then they might stand a chance. #justsaying


  • Studley
    With this country being in the state it's in, if kids asked their grandparents what it was like when they were young, they'd probably tell you that they watched Tiswas and listened to Abba.
  • Jason
    What was wrong with watching Tiswas and listening to Abba? Better than watching Crap Factor and listening to No Direction and all the other manufactured talentless crap out there.
  • chewbacca
    So, BW, you're advocating showing hardcore porn to children? NIIICCCEEE.... Still, most of the deviants on here (and HUKD - particularly Adnan and Elton Chong) already do. On another note, guess which one of my multis recently got banned on there?! Somewhat amiss of me to let it happen, but at least it got THEM foaming at the mouth, which is the main thing. Ho hum, off to cycle my ip address and sign up with another new username. TOP TIP - don't go straight into the misk, it's a dead giveaway!
  • Steve
    @Studley you missed the word "Great" before Grandparents. Used to watch Tiswas? You're probably in your mid forties, lets say 45. If you're a Grandparent at that age, although neither you nor your offspring waited too long before adding to the population, you're not going to be on Jezza Kyle.
  • boring b.
    love the last paragraph!
  • Fat S.
    Chewbacca, guess what? nobody fucking cares.
  • chewbacca
    @Obese Robert from England guess what? If you said that to my face in real life I'd kick your fucking cunt in.
  • Delhi K.
    I could beat both of you at tennis or a gruesome fight to the death so you can both shut up. If you reply then you just acknowledge that i am the best! Rargh!!!
  • Fat S.
    Chewbacca your just a wee immigrant who couldna fry a fish if he wis in a fish shop ya dick

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