RIP Facebook, hello Google+
Now listen here – you’d better all pack up your pictures and your farms and your likes and your pokes and get the hell out of Facebook, because it is almost completely over. The reason is that Google are coming to blast it out of the brine with their own piece of social networking genius. No, not Google Buzz – that didn’t really work out. Or Google Wave – hang on, weren’t they both the same thing?
It’s got the snappy, catchy name of Google+ and they’ve been working on it for a year now. But you can’t use it yet – they’re rolling it out nice and slow. So don’t worry about being a part of it just yet. However once you are involved, your world will become all about ‘circles’ cos that’s how it works.
Google say you’ll be able to share things with small groups of people, or ‘circles’ as they call them – so you can post pictures of your cross-dressing antics without your parents getting to see them. Which is something we’ve been crying out for.
There’ll also be ‘hangout’ and ‘huddle’ elements, that will make the most of video and mobile chat, as well as ‘sparks’ – that’ll be a feature that will help you find online info and content that you care about and can then share with friends. We expect there’ll be lots of Google’s special spying involved in finding results for you there.
Google haven’t said how long it’ll take before there’s a full roll-out for + but we sincerely hope they’ve learned from their recent past mistakes with Buzz and Wave. Right, time to round up all those pesky Farmville animals before we pour kerosene all over our Facebook accounts and give the thing the fiery funeral that it so richly deserves. See y'all in the circle!