iCap looks stupid, but ensures you live longer

Worst. MP3 player. Ever. Did they stop to consider the design for this, even for a second? This, ladies and gentlemen, is the iCap. Before we point out the blatantly obvious security concern, behold this thing of beauty / horror for a moment:

Gorgeous, isn't it? A generic cap with a thick lump of plastic knocked through the front. Always wanted to look like you might have metal plates in your skull? This is the next best thing. Aesthetics aside, there are plenty or reasons reasons why you should consider looking a prize twat by wearing one of these monstrosities:

They you go. Wear an iCap, because if you wear headphones, YOU WILL DIE. If you're not hit by a bus, YOU WILL BE STRUCK BY LIGHTNING. And YOU WILL GO DEAF. And SATAN WILL POUR LIQUID DEATH INTO YOUR SOUL. And you'll probably develop gills like Doug McClure* in the 1978 classic Warlords of Atlantis. You poor bastards.

So. Wearing an iCap is scientifically proven to extend your life**. What do we think is so wrong with it? Well, unless the pictures are missing some sort of chin strap, isn't this the easiest MP3 player in the world to steal? It's a device that can be picked off your head from behind. Maybe that's why it only looks appealing to people who aren't allowed to leave the house unaccompanied.


* actually, I can't remember if Doug McClure did develop gills or whether that was the other slaves. Help me out here.

** not actually scientifically proven, fact fans


  • Jamie
    I recommend if you're cycling and wish to increase your own safety, removing the ear-buds may be a start, but wearing something other than a cap would be even better ;-)
  • Gus
    looks like an I-Crap to me!
  • Honky S.
    Fantastic posting - looks real quality
  • adofant
    Where can i Buy 1? Can wear this with my Borat Mankini......deffo win the fancy dress prize!
  • Martin
    Looks ideal for wearing in the quiet coach of a train.

What do you think?

Your comment