Commercial Break: Spacey ad does the hurty thing to our brainy things
Before we forensically examine this new Kevin Spacey advert cameras, let’s deal with the ‘Hasn’t he got ENOUGH money?’ argument. If someone came up to you and offered you an aching bundle of hard cash in exchange for filming you prancing about like a tit for half a minute, you’d take it eleven times out of ten. That basic human urge doesn’t disappear just because you’ve been in a score of highly-regarded movies and K-Pax.
So, on to the ad itself. Some questions need to be asked. Why is Spacey standing like that? Has he succumbed to a particularly violent attack of rickets?
What has happened to his face? Spacey was never a matinee idol but the front of his head looks like it’s been replaced with a scale model of the surface of the moon that's been buttered and had a couple of raisins added on for eyes. What is going on?
What the foo is ‘the hurty thing' that Spacey speaks of? A photograph that hurts every time you look at it? I’ve got one of those – it stems from my seventh birthday party when, at the height of my obsession with comedian Kenny Lynch, I asked to be blacked up. You can snigger but we’ve all done it.
Spacey tells us: “Don’t be a tourist.” We say: “Don’t be such a wanker.”