Test Tube burgers for everyone!

29 July 2013

hamburger The world’s first test-tube burger will be served in London next week, with its meat made in a lab rather than some stupid shitting cow. The 5oz ‘Frankenburger’, which cost £250,000 to develop, is made from 3,000 tiny strips of meat grown from the stem cells of a cow.

Seeing as no animal died to produce it, the vegetarians will be able to get stuck in, right?

This burger was been created by Professor Mark Post and was funded by an anonymous businessman who will inevitably be the first to try the burger. Post said: "Right now, we are using 70 per cent of all our agricultural capacity to grow meat through livestock. You are going to need alternatives. If we don’t do anything meat will become a luxury food and will become very expensive."

So how is it made? Well, once the stem cells are taken from the cow muscle, it is incubated in a nutrient broth until they multiply, creating tissue that apparently has a similar consistency of an undercooked egg. It is then bulked up in the lab, anchored to some Velcro and stretched. Then, it gets minced and formed into a patty.

Think that sounds a bit minging? The normal process is to kill an animal dead and then hack bits of its cadaver up.

It is thought that this could be on general sale within ten years and Professor Post added: "It comes down to the fact that animals are very inefficient at converting vegetable protein into animal protein. This helps drive up the cost of meat."

Fancy some?

TOPICS:   Supermarket   Not The Onion   Restaurants


  • Captain.Cretin
    I cant wait to try a Lurkey sandwich. (SciFi in-joke).
  • fibbingarchie
    '...animals are very inefficient at converting vegetable protein into animal protein.' How dare they; selfish, inconsiderate, animal bastards.

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