Kraft and Heinz merge: don't mess with our food or else
When Kraft took over Cadbury, we all knew that it would spell trouble for some of our favourite chocolate. And indeed, we saw a large amount of kerfuffle with Creme Eggs.
Well, start worrying about your baked beans, tomato soup and ketchup, because Kraft have merged with Heinz. Together, they'll become what they reckon is the third largest food and beverage company in America. The deal was brokered by Heinz's owners 3G Capital and billionaire gadabout Warren Buffett's Berkshire Hathaway.
Warren Buffett, Berkshire Hathaway chief executive, said: "I am delighted to play a part in bringing these two winning companies and their iconic brands together. This is my kind of transaction, uniting two world-class organisations and delivering shareholder value. I'm excited by the opportunities for what this new combined organisation will achieve."
But what about our beans, Buffett?
This new, merged like Voltron company, will be called the Kraft Heinz Company and they better not start messing about with our HP brown sauce and Lea & Perrins Worcestershire sauce, or Bitterwallet will find out where all the company's directors live, and boot them up the arse for eternity. We're not even slightly joking.