Burger King exploits all of humanity to increase Whopper sales

4 December 2008

Holy Mother of Oats. Without seeing a frame of this advertising campaign, you know the Daily Mail are going to find it outrageous, and try and get it banned. We see their point. Sort of.

Yes, Burger King has travelled to the four corner of the globe, to find ancient tribes and village folk untainted by the whorish ways of capitalism, and force-feed them mouthful after mouthful of fat-saturated meat and bun. In return for a handful of milk bottle tops. Or a donkey. Or fire.

Arriving in remote locations armed only with a Whopper, a Big Mac and a total lack of shame, the team of independent researchers are conducting the "ultimate taste test", with "Whopper Virgins" who have no concept of what a burger even is.

The campaign launches worldwide in three days time. If you're a fan of scientists pouring shampoo into the eyes of sobbing kittens, then this is prime viewing for you. The media will denounce Burger King for the exploitation of innocence, while advertising executives will celebrate the gullible media's outraged response and the thousands of column inches that accompany it. It's so predictable, it's pathetic.

Thanks to Bitterwallet reader Ducky for the tip!

TOPICS:   Restaurants   High Street News


  • Andy D.
    Vile. Utterly vile.
  • Fan
    Hey, can you post a link to those shampooing kittens?
  • Dan
    "Oh no! Some people who had never had a burger before ate a burger. Now the world is ruined!" In other news, still no cure for cancer.
  • jen
    That's astonishingly colonial.
  • bob
    "while advertising executives will celebrate the gullible media’s outraged response and the thousands of column inches that accompany it. It’s so predictable, it’s pathetic." Erm... I'm pretty sure you guys are reporting it too?! You just couldn't help yourselves, could you?!
  • Liddle m.
    "The Daily Mail are going to find it outrageous, and try and get it banned. We see their point. Sort of." The Daily Hate wouldn't waste their time campaigning against this advert. They LIKE exploitation. Oh, hold on. I get you! "Brown-skinned primitive people eating our food. Outrageous! Before we know it, they'll be camped outside Burger King in Tottenham Court Road demanding benefits to feed their burger habit." Gotcha! ... erm ... but ... you sort of see their point? How come? I don't.
  • Pokey
    I'm sorry, but surely it can't just be my dirty mind that finds some humour in the phrase 'Whopper virgins."
  • Liddle m.
    It is not just your dirty mind; mine finds it humorous too. Now pass the ketchup please.
  • Robocop
    Thats bull, cos i just know Bradford has a Burger King
  • dancrawley
    This is wrong in so many ways...........
  • Adam
    OH great Odins raven, I prefer Burger King over the great and wide fast food industries. But what plum thought I know lets make our burgers look great by shoving them down peoples throats who don't have a clue what were feeding them, let alone a word for it. I'd be glad to see this banned just so the monkey who thought this was a good idea could wallow in his own self pity. Seriously who thought of calling them Virgins, look how his colesterol is completly trashed in one bite, this guy used to be able to herd 50 goats through a mountain pass, now hes luckily if he can get himself out of his shack made of twigs and mud. Buts its ok, he's had one burger king in his life, the nearest quick fix is 3,000 miles away, in a foriegn and magical land. :(
  • Craig
    By the beard of Zeus! Nothing much to say, just wanted to add in another Ron Burgundy quote. Perhaps the wider picture to this story is that Burger King want to speard obesity around teh world, perhaps make their own overweight, fat American ass's look that little bit smaller!
  • Spoonyboy
    Brilliant news....free bugers. Hopefully they will target the areas of the world where people are starving, I'm sure they would gladly eat a few whoppers regardless of the health implications.
  • Sam
    Lucky tribal gits... I'd love a free burger right now.
  • Because B.
    [...] on the heels of the ad campaign where remote tribes are urged to try their first ever BK burger,  they’ve now unleashed a [...]

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