It's the Mystery (can) Machine!

You're thirsty. You want a drink. And so, you walk up to a vending machine to complete the incredibly simple process of buying yourself a drink. You pull out your wallet, finger through your change, put it in the slot and... BAM! It hits you.

mystery can

Mystery Can hits you right between the eyes and you feel a pressure you've never felt before. What will it be a can of? Dog food? Napalm? Dr Pepper? You do the only sensible thing. You kill yourself.



  • anon m.
    Got to be Lilt, no way would you intentionally buy that crap
  • SecondOne
    probably Lilt pineapple and grapefruit
  • Boris
    It's a can of whoopass. Seriously:
  • kv
    it's either Mountain Dew or Crab Juice
  • avenue n.
    Got to be Mountain Dew, Nasty tasting chemical Yuk....

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