The Week in Review on Bitterwallet

18 October 2008

http://img522.imageshack.us/img522/8471/weekendcatstatic2575359qa8.gifWoohoo! It's the weekend, and it's sunny! Miracles do happen in Little Britain...

Here's a recap of what's been happenin' on Bitterwallet this week.

Wall Street traders and City suits remain stressed and struggling through the banking crisis. But none have felt the economic impact from America more than the world's 4th richest man.

That's because Mittal didn't read our article on buying gold, nor inside tips on the Tehran stock exchange.

Truth is, Mittal's probably just bought too much stuff.  A nice art collection, huge ass TV, maybe even a few Elmos. At least he's not a broke rock star.

And he's happy, because none of you nominated his company for the list of Worst British Companies in 2008 (unlike British Gas, the cheeky sods.)  Is it because he doesn't run a call centre? Or have ya'll just been too busy eating £4 for 4 roast dinners and pirating music to give a shit?

Our James Bond 007 set arrives next Monday, so we're happy.  We've blown £9.99 £99.99, and we need ways to make some more money.  The 007 Spy Laptop would complement the box set well (but not from PC World) with the way the government is going.  We're not Wilf Butler, and telesales people know that when they find and reuse our public info.   So beware of the online phishing scams and spam, make sure you protect yourselfEspecailly if you're AmericanJack Bauer has been too busy ruining his career with Japanese schoolgirls to save you in 24 hours.

And buy in the EU, so that you have 14 days to refund when the new Apple gear confirmed at the Apple Keynote comes out. Make a trip to the istore, don't waste your time, do something more productive.  How about hiring an air powered automobile? But first consider the cheapest cars before you negotiate for the electric porsche.  And try not to get ripped off.

Drive your date to a restaurant where everyone seems to know you. Impress them by bringing a futuristic can opener, use a Ronco smoking ash try, and avoid measuring your penis in public (it's apparently considered rude in this country, I speak from personal experience).  If all goes well, time to spend a night in Paris, or at one of these many cheap hotels.  Just make sure you kill the germs first.

For those flying somewhere, grab the best economy seat(s) possible and avoid Pythias Brown (unless you're good at finding your stuff back on eBay like Posh and Becks).  Flight attendants may seem grumpy if you watch too much porn on your ASUS touchscreen, especially if you're an asshole consumer.

Don't forget about free parking at the airport.  You don't want a $9.5 million parking ticket when you get back home.

Finally, the weather's getting chilly.  As an MD, it's my duty to ask you to look after your health. Try Japanese cow milk, or some quality central heating.  My fake arm tatoos seem to be a good solution.

Have a great weekend! :)

1 comment

  • Wilbur C.
    I have to agree and found this very interesting :-)

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