Thanks Tesco, I realise I do need glow-in-the-dark handcuffs

20 October 2010

Avid Bitterwallet reader Klingelton spotted his local branch of Tesco selling 'glow-in-the dark handcuffs' - you know, that traditional Halloween costume accessory. For your daughter's Witch Police outfit. Or the zombie S&M practitioner. Or... actually, we can't think of a Halloween costume that involves handcuffs. It's a rubbish idea, Tesco.

Perhaps the supermarket behemoths realise they're knocking out an utterly pointless line of products to jack up their profits, because they've come up with perhaps the greatest sales pitch of all time:

Bitterwallet - Tesco handcuffs

Yes kids, now you really can enjoy hours of safety! Sounds brilliant. Props to the marketing department once again, Tesco.


  • PaulH
    Trust Klingelton to be looking at them...
  • klingelton
    Me and mrs Klingelton have tested them. they do indeed offer hours of fun. The safety word was bananas.
  • Nobby
    It says not for child... Is there an age limit missing off the side of this comment? I would like to use these to restrain my kids, to give me hours of fun and safety.
  • Silk
    Oh come on, use your imagination. Zombie prisoners with the cuff hanging limply off one wrist. Executioners with the cuffs hanging from their belt. Zombie cops. Have you never dressed up?
  • PaulH
    @Silk I find clothes a distraction from the pursuit of spiritual and intellectual fulfillment.

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