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Some kind of headline with the name 'Willy' in it goes here....

29 January 2011
By Andy Dawson

The Royal Wedding is but a matter of weeks away and between now and April 29th, and between then and now, a myriad of William & Kate commemorative products will fill the shelves of our poor shops.

But will any of them be as classy, or for that matter, as useful as this?

Screen shot 2011-01-29 at 18.21.07

Yes, it’s the commemorative Royal Wedding cock-socks – they don’t have the royal seal, so they probably won’t play a major part in the actual royal marriage, but how can you resist something that is described as…

“Combining the strength of a Prince with the yielding sensitivity of a Princess-to-be, Crown Jewels condoms promise a royal union of pleasure. Truly a King amongst Condoms.”

It sounds like they’re promising you the best, mock-posh sex you’ll ever have. How can you resist?

7 comments

  • zacspeed
    Who gives a fuck!
    Reply ·
  • oliverreed
    always fancied a posh wank
    Reply ·
  • James H.
    Are these Regal Recepticals available in my size?
    Reply ·
  • Di
    It's a bit later for you James you necro.
    Reply ·
  • James H.
    If these had been around in January '84 then little Harry wouldnt be with us. That or he'd be less ginger and with bigger ears. And probably a smaller cock.
    Reply ·
  • Nob
    > If these had been around in January ‘84 then little Harry wouldnt be with us. So you would have bought condoms with a couple of one-year old babies on the packet?
    Reply ·
  • James H.
    Nob - thats about as good an idea as i've heard. What better way to encourage turgid young bucks to sheath their pork spears than a picture of what could happen if you dont? Im surprised our meddling government havent slapped pictures of babies sodden nappies all over condom packs just to get our attention, lest we forget to do what we are told. They could have a picture of Jodie Marsh's puss filled piss flaps to encourage the fairer sex to share the reponsibility.
    Reply ·

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