Sainsburys power new store with customers' tyre tracks

16 June 2009

A branch of Sainsburys in Gloucester Quays has gone greener than the Hulk with the help of pioneering car park technology that will help to power the store itself.

Electricity used to run the store’s checkouts will be powered by energy generated from customer’s vehicles driving over ‘kinetic energy plates’ in the car park to power its checkouts. Like, from the future or something. Or a London nightclub.

Alison Austin, Sainsbury's environment manager said: “First the checkouts, then the refrigerated section, then EARTH will belong to me you fools!” Of course she didn’t. What she really said was: “Using amazing technology like this helps us reduce our use of carbon and makes Sainsbury's a leading energy-efficient business.” See, the first quote was more exciting wasn’t it?

We’ve had a think and have come up a handful of other ways that supermarkets can conserve their energy output. Feel free to add your own…

  • Switch the freezers off for 10 minutes once an hour. The food should probably be fine.
  • Put convicted shoplifters on a giant hamster wheel round the back of the store.
  • Make customers move the checkout conveyor belt along themselves using a crank handle.
  • Instead of binning short-dated food for freegans to nick, burn it in furnaces along with packaging and create the first ever steam-powered supermarket. Or something.

[Which?]

6 comments

  • Simon
    This isn't the droid you're looking for.... you want aisle 26, next to Call Of Duty 4 for £25... :)
  • Tom P.
    If they cut the car parking spaces down by 90%, they'd generate plenty of juice by letting the fools drive around all day looking for a spot to park in.
  • Francis R.
    'R2D2 resorted to sweeping floors at TESCO when apperance work from Star Wars dried up'
  • Giles
    Turning off the freezers would mean they consumed more power when they started again! This is just a way of using my petrol to power their supermarket... what do they think it is, free energy? This is hardly 'green'!
  • Rob
    The principle of the conservation of energy states that Energy- you can't make it, you can't unmake it! Basically by making 10,000 cars a day drive slightly uphill for them they are getting their energy free. This may seem insignificant, pull up to a 'kinetic energy plate' become stationary and then see how many more revs you need to apply to get your vehicle moving. I'm going to park my car in their doorway. Once I'm still, the doors will close and propel me at least 3 feet forwards :)
  • Francis R.
    Are Sainsbury's fucking stupid? Surely they will have consulted environmental experts on this? No? Didn't think so. By causing cars to consume more fuel they are ADDING to the 'so-called' green house gasses, and CO2 emmissions, it would be simpler, and more environmentally friendly to use the customers as a means to create energy, that would make them require more food, so they put more food in their baskets! Simples. Sainsburys, my consultation fee is £250/hr, the first minute is free. Minimum consultation period is 25hrs. Initial consulation admin fee is £300 + expenses, @ £450

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