Now Tesco launch tyre-flogging service


Tesco’s efforts to dominate everything everywhere ever are continuing – last week we told you about their new gold-buying scheme and this week we’ve learned that they’ll soon be flogging… tyres?

The supermarket behemoth are teaming up with online tyre giant to create a brand new Tesco Tyres service. Punters will be able to order online and then visit one of 1,200 affiliated garages to get the things bunged on to the corners of their cars.

Naturally, Tesco say pricing will be competitive when compared to the likes of Kwik Fit and ATS and the usual Clubcard points will be on offer. We confidently predict Tesco Funerals, Tesco Tattoos and maybe one or two Tesco brothels before the year is out.

Ironically, the man behind, Mike Welch, used to be a Tesco shelf stacker as a teenager. We’re struggling to give a shit about any of that though.


  • Delenn
    That's a very Wal-mart thing for them to do.
  • bob
    Shall we prolong the inevitable or just change the name of everything to Tesco now?
  • Dog B.
    Won't be long now before Tesco start the invasion of Denmark....
  • The B.
    When you say he was a shelf stacker, did he work weekends while doing his O/A levels/degree or did he actually work his way up the ladder? I just thought it might interest J, who's concept of working class is a bit blurry.
  • Tim
    Tesco Value tyres?
  • Mark C.
    I hear they're planning on annexing the Midlands, bulldozing the lot and turning it into a giant warehouse. Doubt anyone will notice. Personally I'm hoping they'll eventually change their name to Acme, and start selling rocket boots and 10,000 ton weights.
  • Dog B.
    @MarkC Do you bum coyotes ? Catch this comment while you can readers, the moderators will be on it like foxes on chickens.
  • Paddy
    I've used Blackcircles before and have had no problems with them whatsoever. @Delenn-it'll only be Walmart when they start selling 9mm & 5.56mm ammunition in the sports area...
  • RayMan
    I'm waiting for them to launch TescoJet, the ultra low budget airline (using Tesco value Tyres on the plane of coarse)
  • br04dyz
    @RayMan ..... why stop at TescoJet when "Tesconaughts" sounds much more lucrative
  • Cheesey
    Soon we'll be paying Tesco for the oxygen we breathe.
  • Tom
    The co-op have a large range of services too.
  • jason w.
    i've worked in the tyre industry for the last twenty years and seen many scheemes idea's and concepts come and go but this one fills me with dred, by using and supporting this activity may give some of it's users a slightly cheaper deal, but this will without doubt just cause more and more small independent tyre dealers to struggle or even close their doors. the reduced profit these dealers get for fitting a tyre is something they can at present absorb with regular day to day businees but when this becomes the bulk of their trade because tesco and whoever else joins in has started taking a slice of the profits for themselves. at this present time where getting the best deal on everything we buy is key it is more important than ever to shop around but i urge everyone who reads this to check all the local dealers not just the guys online and remember a phone call can still save you money. support your local business's not just in tyres but with everything you can we used to have butchers greengrocers fishmongers newsagents on all high streets someone who understood what they sold now we have supermarkets who don't care what they sell rather they worry about making more and more profit and control more and more of everything we buy. sorry for the rant i could have gone on for ever jason w
  • East-Coast-Tyres L.
    Cant agree with you more Jason. I'm an independant Fast-Fit surrounded by "Big Name" tyre fitters. I just manage to keep ahead of these guys due to the loyaty of my customers, but how long will that last when they can get card points for buying something they can possibly get cheaper elsewhere just by phoning.By the way Tesco ripped the heart out of my town by forcing the small shops out of business. Hope i'm not going the same way. Martin (I shop @ Asda )Armstrong
  • Stevo M.
    Just had tyres fitted by an independent tyre fitter. Two fronts for £80 which I thought was fantastic deal. Tesco's want £115 for the same thing!!! Tesco's aren't the cheapest option

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