Lost - decent marketing idea, answers to the name of BT

2 September 2010

If we're arse-baringly honest about it, the BT ads featuring manchild Kris Marshall getting some dreary MILF up the duff were about as stimulating as a handjob from Tattoo in Fantasy Island. Cringing dialogue counterpointed by advertising messages so obvious they caused blunt force trauma ("FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, PLEASE USE YOUR HOME LANDLINE") left the audience feeling like they'd watched 30 seconds of milk curdling.

But where to next? How can BT possibly top an improbably poor advertising campaign that will fade from the memory quicker than Steve Brookstein? With this:
Bitterwallet - BT flyer
Avid Bitterwallet reader Justin gets enough crap shovelled through his door, without the need for scummy faux flyers that smack of desperation: "After their online badger-bating they've now stooped to paper snail-mail shots that approximate broadband to a cat." Stay classy, BT. And for the love of sweet baby Jesus, stop giving money to Kris Marshall.


  • Alexis
  • Alexis
  • lightning101
    I rate handjobs from midgets pretty highly if i'm honest
  • pt21
    They've got to be kidding. BT Broadband is the worst provider I've ever has the mis-pleasure of using, and their hardware blows too.
  • Ben
    It could be worst - it could be talk talk....
  • ffblue
    It could be worse - it could be AOL....
  • Nobby
    Great introductory price = we're going to fuck you up the arse for the rest of the contract.
  • Wonky H.
    Bummings from BT. Where do I sign.
  • Darren
    I have BT Broadband, and have no problems, I think they do a good job, Was with sky, but since moving house last month, they told me that It would take 3 weeks to connect the phone, and another 3-4 weeks to connect the broadband after that. It took BT 5 Working days to do both togeather! D
  • klingelton
    every telephone/internet/tv company is shit. @lighting101 - midgets are great, they make your cock look massive!
  • Nobby
    > @lighting101 – midgets are great, they make your cock look massive! Young children do the same thing.
  • klingelton
    internets policies will be after you Nobby, or should i say PETE TOWNSEND!
  • klingelton
    *police that was supposed to be...
  • Darren
    Need Edit Button!
  • Lee
    don't go anywhere close to BT, they'll bite your wallet and give you shit.
  • klingelton
    true story this. back in the dark ages when BT was all that was available to me in the deepest recesses of North yorkshire's rural areas - I was a BT customer. BT went down one evening. BT have a measure from ofcom that says they must fix your internets before 7 days or they fail, so they put a great deal of effort into fixing your internets for those 7 days. If they fail - they no longer care. I was without internets for a month and they still charged me for it. True story that is. They also cocked up the move when i moved. I gave them the notice and they failed to set up the line at my new address and they neglected to install my broadbands, which is a shame because the BT vision malarky wasn't that bad. They also tried to charge me for that - which i declined and they accepted my declination. Also a true story that is.
  • dunfyboy
    "Half the world's online" says the estate agent as he connects over 3G (which BT don't do) as Nick from My Family phones his milf on his mobile (which BT also don't do anymore). BT vision's just as bad. TV over your broadband? Not with the shitty line speeds BT have given us. BT adverts just remind us how crap BT is.
  • Jim
    I get "come back to BT" letters virtually every month saying how they are sure they are now better value and give me an introductory price. 9/10 times, the introductory price is significantly more than I'm paying now, let alone the normal price.

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