Commercial Break: Smug life

8 June 2011

With this ad for their Millicano blend, Kenco aren’t just selling coffee, they’re selling a lifestyle. Sadly, the lifestyle in question belongs to monumentally-average actoress Keeley Hawes and it’s an intensely annoying one.

Obviously Keeley loves the coffee – that’s her job on this occasion. But let’s hear about some of the other things she loves. There’s knitting, her vintage bicycle and her roll-top bath. What a sickeningly twee selection. The energy companies are pricing us all out of ever having a bath again and she’s banging on about how great hers is. Thanks.

We always hoped that Keeley Hawes had a hidden darker side to her. “Here’s some of the other things I’m loving... dragging my itchy arse across the floor like a dog, throwing a tin of pineapple chunks through the window of an abandoned hospital and going ratting with my dad.” If only...


  • Joff
    I'm convinced Keeley has a filthy side to her. I know her type
  • Boris
    I am 'loving' Keeley Hawes right now. That is if by 'loving' I mean playing with my 'roll-top' while looking at her. That is if by 'roll-top' I mean penis.# Not really- I'm no blind perv. I'm circumcised.
  • Matt
    That so called coffee shes drinking looks a bit on the clear side. Looks like green tea to me.
  • Dick
    She loves her velvet.
  • Mark C.
    Wow, so it's the bland taste of instant coffee teamed with the grit you find at the bottom of a cup of ground coffee - talk about the worst of both worlds.
  • Edd
    "She is like a leathery, old, second-rate Keira Knigthley wannabe" Quoted from else where, but seems quite apt.

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