Commercial Break: Foam Bolt arms turn hero to zero

If you asked any member of the Bitterwallet team who their hero was we’d all give you the same answer – He-Man. But He-Man doesn’t exist, so our real life hero has to be Jamaican super-sprinter Usain Bolt. Or at least it is this week, after he smashed the 100m world record to smithereens again the other day.

Now, to capitalise on the freshly-birthed Boltfever (that we’ve just made up,) Puma have distributed foam Bolt arms around the stadium in tribute to the great man’s trademark pose. He’s also made a viral ad (below) where he demonstrates them to a gawping bystander. Oh dear. It's awful. Like getting Jimi Hendrix to take part in an air guitar competition.

Later today, Bolt should seal his place in the final of the 200m as well and it could be well worth betting that he’ll tear that world record time up as well. It seems like we’re living in special times when it comes to speedy geezers – but if it turns out he’s on whizz-pills we’re gonna kill the lanky bastard.


  • Tom P.
    Well, if "CHICKS DIG 'EM", i'll have half a dozen
  • RSG
    lol that is poor...suppose money is to be made..why not do it!
  • RSG
    fyi ill bet my house he wotn break his won 200m record there is no need to..he has no competition
  • Martha F.
    I stuff these down my 'Y' fronts, makes it look like I have a massive... foam arm stuffed down my 'Y' fronts...
  • Nobby
    Blimey. He should advertise watches, or razors, or vaseline, or marmite, or something else.
  • Scoucer S.
    . . . or advertise a remedy for when you've got the runs!
  • Brian
    Hi, Brian here. Will these arm things help me get TWO HOT MILF's in one go like that dude?
  • Martha F.
    They certainly helped me to get your mum Brian
  • Andy D.
    @RSG - when can we move in?

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