Commercial Break: All hail the Purity Bear!

19 January 2012

Youngsters! We know that your teenage years are confusing and upsetting, with your body and emotions and all that shit. But don’t let the rest of your entire lives be ruined and knackered by making the woeful mistake of getting naked with each other and doing sex things all over the bed or floor.

Purity is where it’s at in 2012, and it’ll DEFINITELY be worth it if you wait until you’re married before you strip off to your socks and do the sex things. So, the next time you feel tempted to do some ‘nude boning’, think about the contents of this infomercial video from the good folks at the Day Of Purity campaign.

If that doesn’t do the trick for you, get yourself a Purity Bear and carry it around with you at all times. You’ll quickly find that spurning offers of ‘adult hugs’ will be the least of your worries.


  • Emma
    OMG the freaky bear!
  • nicholson101
    yeah sure, Mr bear, you look cuddly, but i wouldn't fuck you.
  • Paul G.
    Whahey! Happy days! Oh. Hold on. Purity Bear? I though you said pedobear. Bugger.
  • Dick
    You've got your whole life to go without sex once you are married. Get some while you can.
  • Alexis
    Surely people who are brainwashed by this shit don't know where anything goes anyway?
  • Alexis
    When the woman asks if you want to come inside, remember these three words, 'No whore no' say it and repeat it so when the time comes you'll be ready
  • Thoughtmaster!
  • Frank P.
    Perhaps Purity Bear could bang the shit out of this annoying twat and hopefully kill him
  • Sicknote
    Only someone with a long history of physical and mental abuse could conceive of this advert - I bet those kinky bastards at the Catholic Church are behind it with special advisor Gary likes-little-kids Glitter.
  • oz
    Did you see the 'please use the front entrance' sign on the door Is this an anti an*l vid? Is it ok to 'use' the 'front entrance'? There is subliminal sh*t going on in this vid, there is def more than meets the eye.
  • Thoughtmaster?
    Judge Reinhold is the voice of the bear. Does that change things for anybody? Me neither.
  • Zleet
    Makes me want to go out and rape something.

What do you think?

Connect with Facebook, Twitter, or just enter your email to sign in and comment.

Your comment