Booze cruise craze over as UK stores shut Calais branches


The long-running craze that is the ‘booze cruise’ could finally be over, with Calais supermarkets closing down all over the place as Britons give up Channel-hopping to get the best boozy bargains. Somali pirates are not believed to be a factor in the downward trend.

Instead, the strength of the Euro against the pound is being blamed for the drop in sales, along with better alcohol deals in supermarkets here in the UK.

Tesco have just announced the closure of the Calais branch they opened when booze cruising became as hip and trendy as the Rubik Cube and deely boppers had once also been. Sainsburys and Oddbins also recently announced closures of their Calais stores.

But the booze cruise fad could all start up again if the coalition government presses ahead with mooted plans to bring in a minimum price per unit of alcohol – a possibility that makes us physically shake with fear.

Have you been hijacked by Somali pirates while on a booze cruise? What did they take and were they drunk? How drunk were they? Are you a Somali pirate yourself? Are you drunk? How drunk are you? Tell us in the little comments box below.



  • Donkey H.
    Don't worry, those Supermarkets and booze cruises will be back. With VAT going up to 20% and like you say this Government determined to fuck up drinking for everyone in the form of minimum unit pricing, now they have finished fucking up smoking. Seems that "bad" foods will be next. Stock up and those Walkers while you can! I used to think all pirates where smiley.
  • Nobby
    I'm drunk, very drunk
  • Lance V.
    Moonshine FTW!!!! Made out of crap, tastes like crap but gets you pished for pennies.
  • Lance V.
    Forget my last comment. I meant to say meths.
  • andy y.
  • brian
    Hi Brian here. I don't know if this is relevant to the above story, but my dad told me that a friend of his was so drunk once, he nearly bummed a fox by accident.
  • Wonky H.
    Did he feed it Rich Tea biscuits and say sorry?
  • brian
    Like you don't know Codify.........
  • bimble
    im hammered very hammered - agh thankyou castle of the devil
  • zeddy
    @ Donkey Henry:"Don’t worry, those Supermarkets and booze cruises will be back." Nah, the bastards will be adding extra VAT to travel too. Just sit and die quietly in Blighty.
  • hot d.
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