Big Brother Seeks Smaller, Slightly Meeker Brother

26 January 2009

Hey – you know that National Identity scheme that the government seem hell bent on introducing, even though it’s placed on the league table of popular things somewhere near anthrax and Piers Morgan?

Yeah, that’s the one – Labour’s ‘Poll Tax Moment.’ Well we can all relax, cos it’s all going to okay. Thumbs up like the Fonz. It’ll be fine and dandy. That’s because the government are looking to appoint an independent watchdog to deal with any grievances we might have about being pressured into carrying around an ID card in what’s ostensibly supposed to be a free country.

The job has been advertised in the Sunday Times and Jacqui ‘Boobs’ Smith thinks it’ll be a right corking wheeze for one lucky young whippersnapper and no mistake.

She said, "I understand that people want strong oversight of the National Identity Scheme, and I agree that the security or integrity of the scheme should never be taken for granted." While slowly playing with the top button of her blouse. We expect.

If you fancy the job, there’s a six-figure salary waiting for you. Thick skin and ability to smile meekly at foam-mouthed representatives of civil liberty groups a must. Don't all rush at once.


  • Mike H.
    With jugs like those Jacqui, I hope you do know where I live, you could do with a new necklace though duck, maybe a pearl one? Lets hope there's more articles with 'BOOBS' as tags Andy.... please.
  • Russ
    I dont know about everyone else, but I trust the government to keep my personal data safe, and not for instance leave it on a train or something. Yeah, Im sure they know what theyre doing....
  • The B.
    You know they lost another one yesterday (although it was TNT that lost it)? Well all the data on it was apparently encrypted, now, I deal with a lot of government departments who now encrypt their data and half of them tend to send the password on a post it attached to the CD.

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