All hail the new nine-bin recycling system!


We’re not sure if it falls into the category of 'political correctness gone mad' or 'broken Britain' but the new nine-bin refuse system introduced by bonkers council officials in Newcastle-Under-Lyme has got our heads a-spinning on this lazy Sunday morning.

A labyrinth of different-coloured bins and bags, a local resident described it as: “a genuine tragedy. Whatever happened to the days when you could just hurl your rubbish out into the garden and then set fire to it all once a month when there was a full moon?” Well, she didn’t really but most newspapers make up quotes and attribute them nameless locals so we thought we’d do the same.

According to the Telegraph (who are a proper, big paper and would surely NEVER make up quotes) the new bin system: “includes a silver slop bucket for food waste, which is then emptied into a larger, green outdoor bin. There is a pink bag for plastic bottles, a blue box for glass, foil, tins and aerosols, a green bag for cardboard and blue bags for paper and magazines. Clothing and textiles go in a white bag, garden waste in a wheelie bin with a brown lid and non-recyclable waste in a separate grey wheelie bin.”

Phew, eh readers? Almost makes you hanker for a return to the rubbish-burning days of yore. Only thing is that a recent Environment Department report concluded that the burning of rubbish by lazy sods like us is the biggest contributor to poisonous, cancer-causing dioxins in the air.



  • wonky h.
    I have lots of bins in my back garden. Attracts a number of foxes.
  • PV
    Although the British people are not used to recycling and such innovative activities, it is a thing which is done everywhere in the world. I don't understand the article to be totally honest, are you saying that you have mental limitations and are too lazy to separate certain items into certain colour bins? Surely it can't be that hard, Monkeys can do this, so if you can't then you probably should get your brain checked. But yeah, if it's a quesiton of separating trash into coloured bins and you can't grasp that then I guess there is a population trait or defect in the UK.
  • Laurz
    That doesnt seem too bad, looks like it would take up less room than what we have here in Barnsley where I currently have 5 wheelie bins Grey wheelie bin for standard waste Brown wheelie bin for cans and bottles Green wheelie bin for garden waste and food waste Blue wheelie bin for paper Red wheelie bin for plastic This '9 bin' system is actually 8 isnt it, lets be honest, a silver bucket provided purely for the purpose of carrying your stuff to your bin is not in itself a proper bin is it. If we are including things like this then I have already got a TEN bin system. I have "a silver bin for bathroom waste, which is then emptied into a larger, grey outdoor bin", "a wicker basket for bedroom waste, which is then emptied into a larger, grey outdoor bin", "a silver bin for kitchen and general waste, which is then emptied into a larger, grey outdoor bin", "a brown bin for food waste, which is then emptied into a larger, green outdoor bin" and "a bag for paper waste, which is then emptied into a larger, blue outdoor bin". These don't count, it is ridiculous to think that they should. Essentially this '9 bin' system is actually 4 bags, 1 box and 3 bins. As for this sensationalism of "Households have been told to separate cardboard from paper, and plastic bottles from glass, tins and aerosols" well bugger me. Havent the rest of the country been doing this for years? Barnsley have done it for the last 5 at least.
  • Frogman
    Brits are such whiners...the Japanese take their garbage to a local recycling centres and then sort them into 30+ different recycling containers...and they don't whinge about, they don't set the containers on fire and they certainly take pride in doing their bit to help the environment. Oh, wonky henry, stop putting meat and your leftovers into the bins and the foxes will stop coming...
  • twikki
    mine all goes straight in the bin, screw arsing about with the deeply flawed recycling systems they need to develop efficient mechanical separating systems
  • Laurz
    @Frogman - The Japanese also sell little school girls used knickers and women legally have to wear a bra in an air conditioned building because the men can't control themselves at the sight of hard nipples. Oh aye, those Japanese are a great example to us all.
  • issac h.
    Quote "the Japanese take their garbage to a local recycling centres and then sort them into 30+ different recycling containers" good for them.
  • Janet
    We have 7 children and I want to see there is a planet for them and their own kids to live on in the future. Don't be selfish this is a good idea, we should recycle more! We always try and recycle everything and I mean everything, both my fella and me don't work but we do the car boots at the weekend so use all our old packaging for the stuff we buy as repackaging for the stuff we sell on the car boots. Last week we got a new kitchen off the council but when the guys were going to throw the cardboard away I said 'let me recycle it' they were shocked but left it. I used the stuff to package up some of the items I sell on ebay plus sold the old kitchen as a job lot on there also. If more people were like us we would easily save the planet and not get global warming. I am shocked that more people don't spend more time recycling (we must spend an hour easily each day!!).
  • Milky
    Want to reduce the "pain" of recycling ..then stop buying so much crap! for instance, in our household of 2 adults 1x child & 3 x medium sized dogs (boxers) We only need to put our refuse out once per 6 to 8 weeks, & then it's mainly filled with dog shite! (in tough sacks & wire bound) ..this could even be reduced to almost bugger by utilising a dog-shite wormery, plans for which may be utilised this year, you simply need a "standing time" for the poop due to worming tablets prior to feeding it into a dogs*ite wormery ..the eventual product may be added to a green bin at that stage if you do not wish to use it. So we have a standard size "grey" refuse bin that's practically empty most of the year.. we use a wormery to deal with most of our food waste (not bones, or meat) ..with a second one coming online.. (the wormery is 5ft away from me in my office & doesn't smell) We use a couple of Maplins bug zappers @30 watts per piece one on each floor to reduce use of fly-sprays et-al (as we live by a field) , wood & granite flooring for easier cleaning & quicker cleaning times, more sanitary, if we need to use a green bin we add it to the neighbours... So living with 3 bins & mainly use just the one (the materials bin, paper, card, plastics etc) ..& end up putting about 3 times more than it will take out per fortnight (black bags) grey refuse ..we may as well just add it to the neighbours (except for the dog sh-ite) ..& the green composting bin was sent back. Shows what you actually need compared to use, if you care to think & reduce. Newspapers tend to get saveed for 6 months of the year to use for firelighters in our woodstove, as does alot of green garden waste (yucca type leaves) which are great many in my street. My biggest gripe (I guess) is that councils act at differing speeds where recycling is concerned, i'd like to see polystyrene either phased out or included in recycling facilities (it's possible)
  • Laurz
    @Janet - 7 kids, neither parent bothered to get a job. Case closed
  • Laurz
    @Mikey - How do you manage that? What are you not buying to keep your waste down to such a low amount?
  • youmumma
    @Laurz - It's Milky not Micky. And stop being so negative!
  • (jah) w.
    Laurz - ad-hominem arguments? The person putting forward the argument is bad (in your eyes) so the argument also is? Grow up. Also I'm sure Milky manages it fine, there are loads of us that do. Not buying pre-packaged shite from supermarkets is biggest thing you can do to reduce waste.
  • WTF R.
    How postmodern
  • postmodern
  • andy y.
    Oh Janet tell me you are trolling.
  • Warwick H.
    There must be zillions of plastic containers of all sizes produced to hold milk and the become garbage. Why cant you take the container back to the store and have it refilled from a tank ?. In the days of yore we used to take our jug up to the long gone farm and have it filled, no jug - no milk easy. In Austria you take your empty wine bottle back to the shop, drop it into the recycler and you get a discount off your shopping bill at the till although thats to much work for the lazy tossers in this country. By the way milkmen must be a well endangered species by now , not seen a one for yonks.
  • Laurz
    @youmumma and Milky - Sorry my mistake, my eyes weren't working properly. I wasn't being negative with you I was genuinely interested in how you/they manage it because without wasting food or anything here I still end up with a full bin every two collections at least, i'd say its half full every collection. @jah) wobbly - If she was so concerned about our overpopulated planet she'd not pop kids out left right and centre that then need clothing and feeding and prove a much bigger strain on the planet than me and my dustbin. Also its very easy to recycle when nobody in the house has got a job isnt it, while others at work paying for their own food Janet is sat at home with us paying for hers and her family. I'd love that, i'd spend 5 hours a day making little sculptures out of the rubbish if NINE people were getting fed and watered for it.
  • Amanda H.
    Where the fuck am I supposed to put 9 fucking bins? One is too many, now you want 8 fucking more? Am I supposed to balance them on my fucking head, cause sure as shit I haven't got enough room in my house. I wonder why I didn't buy that mansion last week with 9 spare rooms that can accommodate 1 bin in each room? Oh yeah I remember, 'cause I'm a fucking working class slob without enough money to buy a mansion, and no room to fuck a cat.
  • Warwick H.
    Milky Which recycling bin do you put the dogs shit in ?
  • andy y.
    when I was a lad we hadn't room to swing a cat,now I know it was wrong
  • Monevator
    I'd happily drive around with a 30-bin recycling truck if I was allowed to put other people's tat in it. The world is turning into a lifeless toxic dump, just a bit too slowly to notice at once.
  • Milky
    @Laurz, We are big consumers (We reckon) but try & buy selectively & wash our recycling plastics etc before it goes in a black bag (overproducing), however waste is kept down by changing the dogs diets, therefore poops & tins (tins are non existent) , poop goes in the empty dry dog food sacks which are really thick plastic, then wire tied & thrown in the grey (regular) waste wheelie bin, (this was checked with the council & approved. The wormery works very well & doesn't smell, as the temps have warmed up I can now put it back outside (sheltered from sun & rain, as the worms work best in warmish conditions & get sluggish in the cold). Ours are the "can-o-worms variety & take around 3/5ths of our green waste, working on getting wormery no 2 up & running soon (they have a start up period) then adding in green waste veg cardboard (is good for em) ground up egg shells, allsorts & they chomp away nicely with very little interuption from me. We drink lots of tea so bags are dried for a day in a dish then opened & shredded 9mere moments, all the latest green waste is added & left for the worms to chow on, they are voracious & enjoy variety, my now 6 yr old loves it. Can-o-worms are often available on ebay at around 1/2 price of rrp (but if not local to you could be expensive to courier) So life go's on as normal IMHO, though helped out greatly by shopping at waitrose (better quality less waste, & having purchased a good vacuum sealer for food, this paid for itself in terms of cheap meat reductions from waitrose in one outing, embossed vac bags are purchased from weschenfelders (up north, nr Bitterwallet HQ) we use em for numerous sized vacuum bags, & buy up deals (generally waitrose) on cheeses, meats etc, vacuuming really helps massively lengthen lifespan of most foods, therefore plan better & not throw waste, ...simple & fun. ..then the vac bags can be recycled after use. Our fridge (an A /A+ samsung is set to 3 degrees whereas most fridges are set to 5 degrees), this helps considerably prevent spoilage too! 1/2 full bin every collection isn't bad ..look down your street, so you are evidently doing something right. Also recycling heavily depends on how advanced your local council is doing, &/ or how willing you are to visit a recycling location for things they do not take but are recyclable elsewhere. We "reckon" that we produce a single brabantia bin bag less than 50 litre capacity of some veg (overcapacity currently) & general schmutter every 2-3 weks ..increasingly 4. once you do some separation it's easy to see where you are absentmindedly putting incorrect items in the trash that should & could go in recycling, from that point it's quite easy, also makes it simpler if you have a dry goods recycling bag in the kitchen that everyone gravitates to rather than traipsing outside all the time.
  • Alex
    We already have 5 bins here: 1 black wheelie bin for household waste, 1 green wheelie bin for cardboard and organic matter, 3 crates for newspapers, tins and plastics. We also have special separate white bin bags for disposable nappies. So we're not far off a 9 bin nightmare already really.
  • (jah) w.
    Who said "we" are paying for her, Laurz? That is an assumption you have made. Other than the Child Benefit (which she would still be getting even if she earned £29242387489274 a year) and Tax Credits (again, she'd be entitled to it even if working) she is entitled to, how do you know janet costs you anything? She said she does boot sales and ebay; I've been unemployed before and made £200-£350 a week doing just that. I didn't sign on and didn't cost you a single penny. But then, you know what they say about assuming anything... Despite all that, the concept of universal employment is lol - in every modern society we will have (and need) those who are unemployed. Way to completely not understand labour relations and economic theory. But then they don't teach that in the mail/sun, do they?
  • ButterMan
    How to not be lumped with 9 recycling bins: 1) Live in a block of flats with shared bins 2) Be a business
  • Jambo
    Living in a block of flats with shared bins doesn't disqualify you from recycling in many areas, thankfully. Though why anyone would want to try and "get out of it", I don't know. The individualistic (selfish) nature of many brits, I guess.
  • ButterMan
    Maybe because recycling is a sham? Are we running out of sand? No? Then why use more energy to recycle a glass bottle than just making a new one? Recycling is all about running out of landfill space, nothing more - and those responsible are manufacturers and marketers, not consumers. By the way, do you know what percentage of waste into a landfill comes from businesses rather than from homes? Because if you did then you might logically ask why the fuck I have to have 9 bins full of mouldy chicken carcass outside my house.
  • milky
    @Laurz Go look at they have a good wormery section which if you wished to reduce your landfill further has plenty of info to keep you busy (though the worms wont)
  • Mike
    It is good to see that the British are getting behind the recycling. In the States, we generally use a big blue bin and throw anything that is recyclable into it... People at the recycling centers get paid to sort it out. What can I say, us Yanks are lazier.
  • Matt
    In Hull we have 3 bins (plus one little thing you can use for food to make life easier instead of going outside every time you cook). The blue bin can be used for plastics/ metal/ glass and paper stuff. The brown bin is for biodegradable stuff and then the normal bin. Perfectly easy.
  • dude
    the more we can recycle the better. nuff said. DIS IS REAL
  • al
    i think its rediculous allthose bins for what?? yeah sure i geuss it helps, but they do have ppl who seperate all the rubbish again! when it gets to the dumping grounds.... also the cost to provide every single household with bins is stupid, i think that money could be spent on something better...... and come up with much better ways of clearing rubbish instead of !9! bins i mean what the fuck....all ya food(left overs) should be put in the genral waste....card should be with paper and or newspapers. bottles(glass should be with plastics). then give some ppl some Fucking jobs to sort the rubbish.... save money, sell the other 8 bins that just take up space and probably fill half the fucking things anyway. keep the one you had in the first place. and use 1 bin. all the rubbish that they recieve probably gets sorted through in the first place.. so yeah i dont really see the point. all you who are blind they are spending the money you pay ( TAX) and going and buying bins for what????
  • doug
    My wife and I work every hour under the sun just to get by in rip off Britian, so we have come up with our own time saving recycling scheme. We have a recycling collection on a tuesday and a landfill collection the tuesday after. So 1 week everything is chucked in the recycle bin and week 2 its all chucked in the landfill. Bollocks to it all, it all gets sorted in the end anyway and this keeps someone in a job

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