Welcome to the stupidest double yellow lines in Britain!

Over in Swindon, simpleton council workers painted double yellow lines along a four feet wide alleyway that is far too skinny to be driven down by a car. With just 13 inches of space between the lines, residents were baffled as to why they appeared along the narrow 60ft long path.

Swindon Borough Council pointed the finger of blame at contractors, adding that they'd probably forgotten "just how big cars actually are".


A spokesperson for Swindon Borough Council said: "It seems that our contractors forgot just how big cars actually are when they painted this one. We will be taking it up with them."


  • Mr M.
    Presumably contractors were paid per metre
  • R S.
    Old news.
  • Abu Q.
    Can yellow lines be stupid?
  • Lord S.
    Did they forgot how big cars are? I bet you could find a fox up that alley.
  • Noddy
    Fuck them, I'm still parking my car there.
  • noshit
    It was me, and I'd do it again. QQ mo fos.
  • Captain.Cretin
    Mr J. Clarkson said to be disappointed that he can no longer park his P45 there.
  • Alexis
    Thought it was because motorbikes kept being left down there?
  • Dick
    It's also good if you are following the double yellows when pissed. It is so annoying when they just end.
  • chewbacca
    It's hilarious when both the real and fake "Lord Snooty's" are cunts.............Lol.
  • spaz
    so I cant park my chariot there then?
  • Loafer1946
    Contracter, paid by the metre of yellow lines, uses GPS, has no commonsense or does not give a shit since he is being paid anyway.
  • Tim B.
    In all likelihood, this isn't the contractors fault. They're told where lines need to be painted, so someone in the council decided this alley needed lines. A lowly contractor questioning his orders would be waiting around for days before his question got far enough up the chain for anyone to have the power to do anything, and when it gets there, that person would probably tell him to paint them anyway just to cover his own arse. Far simpler and cheaper just to paint the fucking lines and have done with.
  • Mark W.
    If you did park a car there, you'd be on both sets of double yellows, I wonder if that attracts a double ticket
  • Realist T.
    Motorbikes are pretty slim - so valid i'd say!

What do you think?

Your comment