Rid Us Of This Robot Car Menace
Something’s been troubling me all day – just how awful is the new plan to fit speed control gadgetry to Britain’s cars?
Under the new, voluntary scheme, we could soon all stop worrying about whatever the given speed limit is wherever we are, as our vehicles will know and apply the brakes accordingly.
Heralded as some kind of breakthrough for road safety, it’s actually a complete waste of time and money and avoids looking at the bigger picture. We don’t want to do less driving – we want to do NO driving!
Within ten years, every single road in Britain needs to be converted to a conveyor belt so that we don’t even have to bother with steering or accelerating or even looking out of the windscreen any more – just punch in your destination postcode, sit back and watch your on-board DVD player or indulge in some 3D hologram boxing.
Ten years – that’s the target I’m setting. If it’s not in place by 2019 I’m off to Switzerland. If Lewis Hamilton and Phil Collins are living there, it’s bound to be up and running over there by then.