Woman finds <span style="text-decoration: line-through;">severed finger</span> mobile phone in packet of crisps

3 March 2009

In the history of processed cuisine, many foreign objects - animal, mineral, vegetable - have found their unsavory way into our food. Whether it's the rat's head found in a can of green beans or a severed finger in a pint of chocolate custard, there's a good chance you're going to put something wrong in your mouth.

Such a fate almost befell Emma Schweiger from Wisconsin, who was happily stuffing her face with potato chips crisps when she found herself holding a knackered Nokia handset covered in a delicious "greasy potato-chip film". Seemingly such a generous free gift puts some folk off their fat intake, as Schweiger "doesn't want chips for a while". Some people, eh?

Our favourite quote from the Janesville Gazette, the paper the broke the news, has to be:

She's glad she found the phone and not a child who might have put it in his or her mouth, she said. She's also glad the phone wasn't in a product she would have heated, she said.

Americans have the reputation for being fat knackers who shovel food in their mouth, but it's unlikely a small child would manage to mistake a mobile phone for a potato chip and consequently choke on it. And if it was a product that needed to be heated, we suspect that only a stupid person would do so in a sealed foil bag.

[The Consumerist]

TOPICS:   Mobile

18 comments

  • zeddy
    I'm glad she spotted it. Those things can easily be missed. I'm surprised she was actually eating America's fancy potato chips available in ...oh....3 flavours. At least we have Walkers foisting their shit on us.
  • imranmaz
    "And if it was a product that needed to be heated, we suspect that only a stupid person would do so in a sealed foil bag." Usually products that need to be heated esp, "in the bag" are not made of foil... Which is obviously the point she was making... and usually, you wouldn't rummage through food that needs to be heated with your hand to check there was nothing "foriegn" in there before you heated it up. You would have to be pretty much retarded to say what you said... maybe your parents put you in the microwave by accident when you were a baby? You should ask them next time you have your weekly family only truth or strip game. Jus' sayin'
  • Bob M.
    Bet she tried it with her teeth just to be sure.
  • P E.
    I bet it worked fine until she ate it then packed up after hitting the water when she plopped it out again
  • Amanda H.
    Never liked Sandy Toksvig anyway.
  • Si W.
    shes a thick bitch i wouldnt touch her with my tiny nob
  • imranmaz
    AAAHAHAHAHHAHA Sandy Toksvig!!!!! Dude you are hilarious! Amanda Hugginkiss for next writer plz! Get rid of Paul Smith... too many Pauls on this site.
  • Bob
    Playing Devils advocate here How can she prove that it was in the crisps, she might have wanted media attention and just thought to herself, 'i know how i can get my 15 minutes of fame'.
  • Professorcocktricks
    I wonder if she holds her husbands nob the same way as she's holding that phone
  • Martin D.
    @imaranmaz - are you the same imranmaz who slags this site off in the HUKD forums? If so, can I ask why you continually visit and comment on a website that you supposedly can't stand? Odd. You're odd. Odd little imranmaz. Odd.
  • anon
    not really liking the tone of this article.. playful rudeness is funny, but this is a bit too harsh imo. also, @imranmaz - youve totally missed the point mate!
  • bar n.
    errr... did anyone think of phoning the number marked "HOME" ?? am i being too frikkin' obvious here?
  • Noghar
    This is all such a fuss about bugger all. Either the whole thing is fake and invented by the reporter on a slack day, or a worker at the crisp factory thought they would have a laugh by sticking someone's mobile into a bag of crisps. Think about it - when you pick up a bag of crisps how much do you expect it to weigh? Wouldn't you notice that there was something large and bulky knocking about in there that didn't look much like any form of sliced potato? And all this fake indignation... 'A child might have picked it up and used it to dial a sex chatline... it's an outrage etc etc...' O, do feck off. Honestly.. I expect Bitterwallet do deal with serious matters of import in an appropriately solemn style. Oh wait a minute, no I don't.
  • crispy l.
    Woman finds severed finger mobile phone in packet of crisps. Why not have crossed through: "Woman finds severed 'penis' mobile phone in packet of crisps, there’s a good chance you’re going to put something wrong in your mouth". It would have made this dull article about a fat thick Sandy Toksvig yank look alike more appealing. Come on BW try to spice it up by means of rude innuendo or swear words like fuck every other line. Ohh just heard kiddy fiddler Jacko is in the uk, 'cos I can scare you more than any ghoul would ever dare try, uh uh uh ow' year perv JACKO SEX PEST OUT of the UK :( run a vote on that BW
  • Lindsay
    Is there anything to be done when foreign objects are found in food? I found a shard of plastic in some pasta- complained and the company didn't believe me- I sent a pic and they accepted I wasn't lying and apologised... and thats it. Can I take it further elsewhere or is this the way it normally goes? Cheers!
  • Noghar
    I found a huge paperclip, well a clip anyhow, in a tub of Tesco pineapple cottage cheese a year or two ago. Being an officious twat I didn't tell Tesco, I sent it to my local Trading Standards office hoping the stink would be bigger. Two months later Trading Standards gets in touch to say, 'We analysed the foreign object, and it appears to be a big metal clip of some kind. Tesco have assured us that they normally put bits of pineapple in, and that this will not happen again.' And that was it! What the fork are these TS counts paid for? Sitting in their offices picking their noses and watching confiscated pirate porno vids, from what I can see. So anyway, my point is, if you're thinking of going to the TS, don't bother.
  • Schitstick
    I found a whole family of foreign objects in a Jumbo packet of Beef McCoys once, im guessing they were Polish, but they could have been from any part of eastern Europe, its hard to tell sometimes. Anyway, i didnt report it, and a friend of mine was able to get them all Gardening Jobs.
  • imranmaz
    Martin Stephenson & Two Of The Daintees - Yep i'm that guy.... I come to this site cause sometimes i feel like reading last weeks news through the eyes of someone that is clearly retarded but tries ever so hard to be funny and liked... pretty much the same kind of guy that gets bullied every day of his childhood and then thinks.. "I'm a grown up now... Yeah i'll show em on the internet!! I'll swear loads and act like i'm really cool" well... it doesnt work but it keeps guys like me humble.... there is always someone worse of than you... well maybe not if your name is Paul Smith... I mean damn... even his surname is generic :( BTW... I thought she had three fingers and her index finger was exceptionally long...but then i looked closer :(

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