The ThiPhone - if we catch you wearing one, you're barred
We like iPhone, but this is going too far. The ThiPhone - as the photo clearly demonstrates, you couldn't look more like a twat if you were wearing a t-shirt with "LOOK AT ME, I'M A TWAT" written across the front and back:
And in a spectacular clutch at marketing straws, the ThiPhone is been marketed as a device to make driving safer:
"Driving while using a mobile phone is dangerous. Studies have shown that having your mind on two or more things while driving greatly increases your chance for problems. The Thiphone™ allows your mind [to] quit thinking about where your phone is and as a result you can concentrate fully on the task at hand... driving".
Surely the safer of the two options is the one that has the iPhone in your line of sight, and doesn't require you to stare in a different direction to the one you're travelling in? Not that you should be dicking about with a phone when you're driving anyway.