The iPhone 5 then - what's THAT all about?

440x330-iphone-5-front-back So, the dust has settled after last night’s launch of the iPhone 5 and the question is this – are we overwhelmed or underwhelmed by it? The truth is somewhere in between – we’re actually just whelmed by it. Yes, whelmed.

The new version of the classic smartphone has got a bigger screen (to the tune of half an inch) and is slimmer and lighter than before, weighing 112g compared to the 140g of the 4S. With a depth of just 0.3 inches (7.6mm), it’s closer to a credit card than the orginal iPhone that spawned it.

There’s a new processor to, which will make it run faster, although crucial stuff like battery life doesn’t seem to have been enhanced at all and you’ll still need to charge the thing up pretty much every day.

The 8MP camera has better low light performance and 40% faster photo capture, with the ability to take panoramic pics. The phone’s second front camera is now HD-quality.

4G is going to be available, but you’ll need to be an EE customer for that and to live in one of the 16 cities where you’ll actually be able to get the new super-speedy mobile broadband.

Perhaps most controversially, the iPhone 5 will come equipped with a new-size ‘charging hole’ (yes, that IS the correct term for it) – you’ll still be able to use accessories that the iPhone needs to be plugged into, but you’ll need an adaptor that will cost you £25.

A new iOS 6 operating system is coming too, with new Apple maps incorporating 3D mode and ‘flyover’ view – all of this replacing Google Maps, which has been kicked to the kerb as Apple detach themselves from their main mobile OS rival.

Additionally, Facebook is to be incorporated into the software, in the same way that Twitter was last time around, so now it’ll be easier to spread lies and misinformation to your closest friends.

Talking helper Siri has been improved too – it’s now working in conjunction with Yelp and you’ll be able to ask it to find your nearest abbatoir or backstreet dentist with little or no difficulty.

The iPhone 5 will be available from 21st September – tariffs will be announced imminently from all the usual suspects.


  • Paul
    It's also going to use a new "Nano" SIM Card, meaning the same old fun and games as with the "Micro" SIM for the 4G and 4GS.
  • Pete
    ... and you still can't change your own battery or put in a memory card. Bet the Bluetooth is also still incompatible with everyone else as well. FAIL.
  • Darren
    Before he posts, as he will.... @StackedTimothy IPhony fanboy who is jealous of Samsung’s ./end QED Or maybe he is too busy queuing for the next IPhone fail. Apple are just corporate bullies that keep the sheep fed with grog... its like battery chickens but with people, free the poor IPhony's
  • JJ
    @Darren Obviously you didn't see the story of Samsung suing LG for $1bn for patent infringement just LAST WEEK, because the vast majority of the media didn't report it. The media have been unjustly biased again, turning Apple into 'bullies' when in reality all tech companies are at it.
  • JOBS
    You missed an answer off the poll: Couldn't give a fuck, as my provider has me stuck in a contract for fucking years and by the time i upgrade, this will be dated and replaced some other shiny piece of white shite.
  • Darren
    @JJ By corp bullies I am talking about more them taking on little companies like the story of the polish supermarket
  • Zleet
    @JJ And I think you missed the fact the Samsung vs LG lawsuit was about stolen technology (that is when a company actually invents something) and industrial espionage over a number of years, not rounded rectangles and loose design patents with little to no actual 'invention' to back them up.
  • Kevin
    'although crucial stuff like battery life doesn’t seem to have been enhanced at all and you’ll still need to charge the thing up pretty much every day.' The battery is using more energy to run the better processor so it has been enhanced, just not in a way that allows you to watch more videos than before. If you want a phone that doesn't need charging everyday you want a phone that doesn't have internet, gps, video playing, data texting, live maps etc etc. You make a choice of what you want and if you want those things you're going to have to charge it. This isn't a Nokia phone from the 90's that is still running off it's original charge :P Personally I think it's lovely but I don't have the money to upgrade from my iPhone 4, or indeed my iPad 2.
  • Inspector G.
    I'm already queueing outside my local Apple store
  • Tweedskin
    @Kevin, No, the new A6 processor uses less power than the previous A5 and A5x. The battery's mAh rating hasn't been updated, just the chip and the phone have become more frugal in terms of the power they draw from it.
  • Frank
    I purchased the iphone 4 32g when it first came out and up to now never had a single problem with it and it's still in mint condition, when the 4s came out for me there just wasn't enough difference for me to feel i must rush out and get it, from everything i've heard about the iphone 5 i wont be rushing out anytime soon for that one either.
  • captain c.
    Having endured all the hype and read the reviews I can say convincingly that I am completely "Whelmed" Or perhaps that should read "Meh".
  • boing
    How many iphone articles to we need?
  • Russ
    I was really hoping for something special from Apple, having been a happy owner of a 3GS prior to getting my HTC Desire HD, I was hoping the new iPhone would be sensational, at the moment I will be getting a Samsung when my contract expires at the end of the month
  • chester
    It's the Nokia 920 for me as that is easily the most innovative phone out.
  • Idi A.
    I wannit I wannit I wannit I wann Sorry, what were we talking about again?
  • Chewbacca
    And STILL the same OS, albeit slightly modified. Fuck me, it looks about 2000 years old. iPhones are shit. I had one, sold it, and got a decent piece of pie.
  • ChristinaApplegate
    A lot of talk on the net about the iphone5 back getting easily scratched. What did people expect from aluminium? Now all you (more money than sense) apple fanatics have to buy a backside protector* as well as a screen protector. * protector is not for your own backside, why would you want to protect your own backside? you need your backside UNprotected, so that apple et al can shaft you good & proper.

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