Drink! Girls! Feck! It's Christmas time at phones4u

Christmas time! Mistletoe and wine! Children singing Christian rhyme! Plus trussed up turkeys and an arseholed, trouserless Santa pissing all over the floor after too many cans of lager. It's this heartwarming vision of Christmas that phones4u want to greet their customers with when you visit their website:

Bitterwallet - Phones4U Christmas website

Father Christmas has even found time for a tab, and are those fishnets he's wearing? It says quality, service and choice, right there. Well done, phones4u.

[The Register] thanks to Bitterwallet reader Mark


  • 3
    how depressing
  • John V.
    On the pictures of the screens on the phones there's snowmen beating each-other up.
  • Steve
    I actually thought someone may have shopped the images, but they actually have those images on their site????? How the feck can they think that is acceptable?! Publicity stunt, blatantly!
  • DirtyPixel
    Wouldn't buy a phone off the cunts if i were the last snowman on earth, but that's funny as fuck :-)
  • Nutgobbler
    Xmas will be over by the time their webpages take to load
  • Kevin
  • Brian
    Hi, Brian here. We need more "out of the box" thinking like this for Xmas (i am a Christian and believe in the LORD and HIS SON)
  • Lumoruk
    You mean 'SUN' Brian, jesus you need to watch more YouTube
  • charitynjw
    @ Brian - Trouble is, if it's out of the box, they won't give a refund on when you take it back on Boxing Day
  • Sing B.
    Looks like someone told that cunt doing the phones4u advert voiceover that he didnt need to put emphasis on the word 'people' in their latest advert. Still sounds like a ghetto chav though..innit, blud.
  • Marcus S.
    I'd like to know what a "ghetto chav" is - is it some new kind of parrot?
  • Celia
    My email to them - yesterday - I suggest you need to review whoever plans your advertising. Your Christmas decorations on your web site and presumably in your shops is appalling and disrespectful. You think this will win you customers? Well - I guess it depends on what type of customer you wish to attract. It certainly wont be me now. Their reply today - In keeping with the rest of our 'Great Deals 4 Popular People' advertising campaign we have decided to use some tongue-in-cheek and light-hearted imagery on our website and in our stores to support our seasonal promotions this year. This imagery will continue to change throughout the campaign to keep it fresh and interesting. The aim of the campaign is to engage with our target audience of 16-24 year-olds and reinforce our unique tone of voice through fun, anti-kitsch advertising that challenges the stereotypical portrayal of the holidays you see on the high street. The imagery used on our website, our current advertising, and point of sale material is meant to be humorous and entertaining and not meant to be taken seriously. We apologise if it has caused you any offence. Kind regards, Chloe Farrow Phones 4u Press Office
  • ButterMan
    I see they've had to remove the iPhone from their site as well - looks like Apple don't share their sense of humour.
  • Marcus S.
    Celia, I don't think they ever wanted to attract you. Old (young?) fogies aren't the market share they are aiming at. I'd never buy from p4u, but I find the adverts amusing, not appalling or disrespectful (to who, I would ask?).
  • phones4u B.
    [...] wacky guys at phones4u, eh? A couple of days ago they redressed their website with some half-arsed Viz style doodlings of Father Christmas and dead turkeys, in keeping with the Yuletide [...]
  • Celia
    Marcus de Sade (guess the name says it all) - its not a question of old or young fogies - its about basic respect - something sadly lacking in some areas it seems. Have to say - fogey or not - my amusement comes from more mature things thankfully! Celia
  • Worst B.
    [...] we’re still trembling at the thought of Phones4U’s current ad blitz, which features a pissing Santa. Mmm… what a delightful festive [...]
  • Lottie S.
    In all my years of researching dating, I think that this is what most women I can think of without a doubt should read. That's why I I wanted to leave this comment. Keep doing what you're doing. =D

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