Congratulations, Tesco, for the most desperate PR campaign ever

1 November 2010

Bitterwallet - Tesco MobileIt's already well established that Tesco whore the living daylights out of Halloween because it has become such a massive money-spinner for them, particularly since the demise of Woolworth's.

The supermarket was expecting to rake in £55 million in the weeks leading up to yesterday, by selling pumpkins, exclusive DVDs and a lot of crap that is beyond explanation.

"Beyond explanation" also describes the thought process behind Tesco Mobile's latest PR campaign:

"Research has shown that having the latest technology at our fingertips has caused a surge in the number of paranormal images that have been recorded.

"Tesco Telecoms has found that one in three people have noticed spooky goings-on in photos and video clips taken on their mobiles.

"This spine-chillingly high figure is driven by the growing popularity of Smartphones which have high quality cameras and the internet and email at the touch of a button."

Don't worry, though, there's an expert on hand to make sense of this otherwise terrifying attempt at grabbing column inches:

"Taking their findings to Paranormal Research UK, leading investigator Phil Hayes confirmed that they had seen a 70% increase in paranormal evidence captured by Smartphone cameras or videos".

Right. And?

"Frighteningly, almost 60% of those questioned had or knew someone else who had experienced paranormal activity, with one in two saying that they had experienced a shiver down the spine upon entering into a room."

Somebody, call Peter Venkman, quickly!

"Some of the male respondents even cheekily cited their wives first thing in the morning as the scariest thing they’d ever seen!"

LOL. Apparently 3,000 consumers were polled in order to create this press release which, like a spectral demon of hell, is entirely transparent. Anything to get Tesco Mobile in the press, right? Actually, no - according to Google News, no newspaper has published the research since its release on Friday.

TOPICS:   Mobile

4 comments

  • Phil
    Has anybody ever met anyone whose been asked their opinion in these surveys? I'm convinced there's a lock up somewhere full of lunatics whose sole purpose is to provide "opinions" for this type of crappy survey.
  • boring
    congratulations, bitter wallet, for the most desperate story attempt ever its halloween, people have fun, get over it
  • Jon
    Yes, theye're called Tesco employees. They are all bred in captivity in solitary confinement so that when they are released on to the general public they have no idea how to deal with them properly, and simply grunt and point and smile when the fabled 'Clubcard' is shown to them.
  • donttouchthehair
    I once bought a second-hand 'smart phone' off eBay. It didn't have any pictures of any ghosts, but it did have a few shots of some chav's ghoulies. Thanks for reminding me.... :*(

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