Swiftcover will charge you extra to reduce THEIR risk. No, really.

Bitterwallet - Iggy Pop can fuck off

We all know about Swiftcover – they like to give the impression that they’re different from other stuffy insurance companies, what with bunging wiry pensioner Iggy Pop some cash to appear in their dread advertising campaigns.

Of course, it all unravelled for them a bit when it turned out that Swiftcover had a zero tolerance policy when it came to actually insuring wild, cock-swinging rocksters like the ageing Mr Pop, something that led to a ‘swift’ backtracking from the befuddled company.

Now Bitterwallet reader Ferris has emailed us (and no, we didn’t ask if he was on his day off), highly pissed off at Swiftcover’s apparent unwillingness to get involved with anyone who might be deemed ‘a bit risky.’ He says…

[My father] has named both his younger daughters insured on his policy as learner drivers for the last few years.  The first daughter passed her driving test in March, no problems there.  The second daughter passed her test yesterday, and it was impossible to update her status to a full licence holder.  Apparently this is because "Unfortunately having two drivers on one policy with a full UK licence for less than 1 year is classed as very high risk and we are unable to offer cover for both daughters on your policy."

Insurance company doesn't like risk?  Well there's a surprise.  Well, OK, seeing as it is impossible to update her status, let's just remove her from the policy altogether.  That should reduce the risk, and with a whole three months left until renewal, the reduced risk has to provide some sort of refund.  After all, a learner driver is a pretty risky proposition, and no doubt Swiftcover are charging us massively for the privilege of insuring such risk.

Not so.  If we attempt to remove the learner driver from the policy, we are actually CHARGED to reduce the risk on the policy, the princely sum of £26.82.  Not a huge amount, admittedly, but remember, this is for REDUCING THE RISK.

Ah, an extra £26.82. They’ll probably just write that off as an ‘administration charge’ – it means ‘we're screwing you out of the price of a pretty decent takeaway in return for someone here pressing a couple of keys on a computer.

As Ferris succinctly adds: “Bastards.”


  • Pizza_D_Action
    Yep, was going to say that is probably just the administration charge. Thousands of people each year must have to make alterations to their car insurance for one reason or another (new car, add drivers etc). When you ring up and tell them they never say "that will be £x additional premium and £x admin fee".... they just say "that will be £x extra" or "you are due a refund of £x (where £x = the amount of the refund MINUS £50 admin fee") Problem is because they never break down how much the admin fee is, most people don't even realise there is one so can't complain about it. Fooking rippers the lot of them.
  • dunfyboy
    Yeah, the biggest insurance fraud is the one perpetrated by the insurance companies on their customers. Wow, went a bit Ben Elton for a minute there. Seriously though, robbing fuckers the lot of them.
  • Mark C.
    What a bunch of cock knocking swingtwats.
  • Esarty
    Bet they wouldn't insure my turtles. I like turtles.
  • Simon
    I had a similar situation which at the time I thought was very odd - I was quoted about £600 for insurance on my first car as a learner driver. It seemed a pretty fair price at the time. A few months later, when I informed them I had passed my test, they bumped my premium to well over £1,000.. huh? The DSA had certified me as being able to drive a car up to their standards.. which is surely a lot lower risk than being a learner driver and hardly having a clue how to drive the thing??
  • Giles
    Learners are actually lower risk due to the fact that they have few accidents. Basically, if a kid is driving his mum's car WITH HIS MUM SITTING IN THE CAR he's less likely to act like a twat. Think about it.
  • IfYouCopyMyNameYouAreGay
    Simon, no. When you're learning, you've got an adult (21+) who's been driving for years with you, and you're driving in a way to help you pass your test. Once you've passed, you're on your own and you drive like a twat = higher risk.
  • Spark
    Insurance companies = bastards.
  • IfYouCopyMyNameYouAreGay
    FFS Giles, stealing my thoughts again.
  • IfYouCopyMyNameYouAreGayIsGay
    I have to admit, I've never seen a learner driver in/cause an actual accident. But I've seen plenty of cocky twat teenagers in their first year wrapped around fences after their 1L corsa didn't grip the 90 degree right hander at 45mph.
  • Nobby
    Young people should not be allowed to drive. The government should set the minimum age at a sensible level, say 45. Then all drivers would be much more responsible. And also they should ban gingers from driving too, to make the streets even safer. And fat people, as they are more interested in shoving burgers down their mouths rather than watching the road.
  • Giles
    I saw a learner (in an instructors car) whip off a wing mirror on a passing car... I was in the learner car behind! Hilarious. Sorry for the thought-theft.
  • pauski
    @ Nobby - and a high percentage of women drivers, Although statistically safer, their driving is usually very poor, which in turn renders a queue of ever increasingly vexed drivers behind. These drivers inevitably speed to make up lost time, and as a result have more accidents. Oh, and don't forget the over 70's, the vast majority of drivers seem to be completely incapable. While we are at it - Foreigners, generally the HGV's. I could go on...
  • ScottC
    As I always say to the girlfriend.... The difference between men and women bad drivers, is that at least men are INTENTIONALLY bad drivers, as they try and drive aggresively and cockily. women bad drivers are bad drivers by default - dont pay attention, and for whatever reason cant multitask behind the wheel (i.e. use a foot at the same time as a hand).
  • Lemon
    Maybe its a tax, as they know that they're going straight to Hellfords and attaching plastic 'kits' to the battered old corsa, like a merkin on a 55 year old minge. You cant polish a turd kids.
  • Nick
    I had to recently pay swift cover £25 ish to get them to update my address on there file as I moved house. It was an admin fee as they told me. Same thingn with my motorbike they charged me £25 odd for a change of address, bike used to be kept in a wooden shed it is now kept in a garage and there was no dicount just an admin fee. I THINK THAT IS JUST INSURANCE COMPANIES FOR YOU.
  • Andrew D.
    I moved house recently. I was parking in the road at my old house. At the new address: To park in the road £43 To park on the drive £7 To park in the garage £21 I don't see the logic.
  • Reduce D.
    [...] Swiftcover will charge you extra to reduce THEIR risk. No, really … [...]
  • Anonymous
    Andrew - my insurance is cheaper if I park in the street than in the drive or garage! It amazes me the amounts these companies charge as an "admin fee" to change things like this - it costs a stupidly low amount to change these things. Especially in the case of address across 2 policies where they insist on charging you 2 admin fees even though the process can be done once and everything else is automated. Bastards.
  • new q.
    You are absolutely a compelling writer. You definitely know how to write to keep the audience engaged. I need to see a lot more of your wonderful writing style in the future.
  • Marcus A.
    I have (had) a policy with Swift Cover. I was surprised that they charged me a whole years Premium yes a whole YEAR!! for having and accident in my last week of my contracted year with them. This is about £1500. The accident itslef costed around £700. No repairs to my car just a dent in the other persons car. Yes the accident was my fault as I was reversing at the time, but surely this cannot be right. does this seem starnge to anyone?
  • Brian
    Swift cover where good the first time I insured my Astra £ 250 . After the first year they sent a renewal note with a years no claims it was £ 485 . Excuse me was that 485 you said , YES 485 POUNDS. But I have 1 years no claims and it shot up almost double . Where is the logic in that . There is no logic at all . I conclude that they are all robbing bastards the lot of them . I complained and they justified their robbery by whining on about price increases etc , all the usual crap that might just merit an in line with inflation increase NOT NEARLY DOUBLE . Kiss my arse swift cover I won`t be coming back. I hope other people read this and ditch you also. I am so pissed off.
  • Ben
    I've just gone to change my address, i now live about a mile from my old address and the car is parked in secure off road rather than just off road... this will cost me £122 extra or £52.50 to cancel my policy as i refuse to pay this so i'm screwed either way! Its outragous and they should NOT be allowed to get away with it!!!!!
  • Ian
    This swindle is still going on. I have been charged an "increased premium" for moving to a safer area. They agree it is safer (a new quote proves so). Financial ombudsman here I come.
  • Gerry G.
    as far as i'm concerend SwiftCover do not have any idea about Loyalty. ive got 3 years no claims. My insurance started at £65 a month - they have just increased it to £112. what the hell is that about. When i obtained a new quote - same car, same terms YES PEOPLE IT WAS BACK TO THE £65 MARK. it is bullshit and as far as im concerend swift cover are shite. you can not get hold of anyone they dont even have a friggin telephone numer. i had to YAHOO ANSWERS it to get it. Stay away, they hook you in and then increase your premium at the first chance they get---who actually reads their renewal email? CON

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