Deathwatch - UK car industry stalls in March
This would be good news if consumers were shunning four-wheeled transport in favour of jet packs and teleportation. But they're not. So it isn't. Car sales in the UK fell by over 30 per cent in March compared with twelve months ago, which is what the business might at best refer to as "a stinker". What's worse is that March is usually a buoyant month for car sales because of new registrations.
Sales of new cars fell across the board, with the exception of the small kiddie-car sizes of vehicle, which actually saw an increase in sales of over 80 percent. The Fiesta was the best-selling car for the fifth month in a row, proving that cost and economy counts for more than having enough room for even amateur cat-swinging.
The slump wasn't seen elsewhere, however. According to the BBC, new car registrations in Germany rose 40 percent in March and in France increased by almost 10 per cent. Both countries have recently adopted scrappage schemes, which sees motorists paid for their old car when buying another.
It doesn't matter because nobody wants a car anymore, and hasn't since the 1960s as this video proves - fuck the Fiesta, we want jet packs and we want them now: