Burger King to bow to feminist pressure and become Burger Queen
Feminist groups have long been angered by Burger King and their sexist adverts.
They've featured women in bikinis, women with split mouths and a whole host of other dodgy adverts. And, as you can see below, a clunkily arrange commercial which featured a phallic burger being wafted into the face of a woman who looked like a blow-up sex doll.
And now, according to a source (should that be 'sauce'? Arf!), Burger King are bowing to pressure in a bid to win back some of the female customers they've lost over the years by changing their name to Burger Person.
Head of Burger King UK Marketing And Strategy Development, Oliver Harrison, said: "In the past, we've endeavoured to have some fun with our marketing campaigns and haven't always got it right. However, we've listened to the criticisms and understand that, in 2014, we need to make some changes. That's why, over the coming months, our valued customers will be able to see a rolling out of our rebranding. Burger King will become Burger Queen. It's as fresh name for a brand known for its fresh produce."
Georgetta Hunt, of feminist pressure group Angry Radical Sex Equalists said: "There's still a lot of work to be done, but this is a step in the right direction. We're pleased that Burger King has realised the need to include everyone and we're going to put more pressure on them so their menu reflects the needs of intersectionalists, cis-gendered people and non-able bodied people."
We must keep the momentum of the company to disrupt notions of cis intertextuality and, through teachings of constructivism, we must see that identities are not compromised by the conversations that make assumptions of the diagonalism of race, class, and female-ness. While changing the 'King' to 'Queen', there will no doubt be controversy, but critics need to check their privilege."
Menu changes are also afoot. As well as more vegetarian options, the Whopper will be rebranded 'The Moon Cup' (served rare) and the planned 'Chunky Chips' will now be called 'Curvy Chips'. The word 'sandwich' is also under revision, thanks to sounding a bit like 'witch'.
The rebrand is planned to roll-out, according to reports, sometime later this year.