Aldi sell depressing Easter chocolate

Easter is sad enough when you think about Jesus H. Chipolata getting nailed to a tree in the sun. Not to mention the giant rabbits forced to crap out massive eggs for our entertainment. And to compound our sadness, Aldi have decided to sell chocolate which will give you an Existential crisis over Easter.

sad chocolate

"Aldi inadvertently stumble upon world's saddest chocolate name," says Bitterwallet fanclub member #00298 Joe Saunders who spotted this.


  • kv
    Slow news week?
  • The m.
    Moff... Fuck off! Nobody likes you! Now go and keep your depression for yourself or go bum a fox!
  • zeddy
    Dairyfine? It's anything but fucking fine taste-wise. Their Chocceur brand is much better. European chocolate with none of the vegetable fat that the "UK" manufacturers tell us we love so much.
  • regular n.
    ' Jesus H. Chipolata'..... One day Gimmers might dare to take the piss out of the name Muhammed and muslims and then we can watch the tabloid uproar and demands for this permanent slow news day site to be taken down. Until that day, Gimmers can continue to make himself look like a complete cunt
  • zeddy
    @regular non-reader: well done you! Lets hear your comedy routine then on the great man.
  • Jesus C.
    More Ham Head heh heh
  • Mary H.
    Hmm, what can we do with all that shit chocolate from the advent calendars no fucker wanted?
  • Head
    Don't diss Jesus, he be back!
  • Jesus
    I sure will and this time I'm bringing my Dad.
  • Alan's m.
    and Tupac Shakur ?
  • Jesus
    Tupac isn't dead. He's in Brazil.
  • Alan's m.
    Is it just me or do those Easter chicks look like penises.
  • Darren
    I just do not get it? Am I missing something. I prefer hollow chocolate rather than filled with crap! this really is a shit story.
  • Jesus
    @darren Hollow as in empty of meaning. I didn't fucking get nailed to a tree so you could stuff your face with cheap treats. This is worse than Christmas, at least that was my bloody birthday so some small gifts are in order. This is supposed to be about me being tortured to death so that all of your fucking sins could be forgiven (and no not the cunting weightwatcher sins). I bloody-well rose from the dead, you try that, I'm talking to you Mohammed! I despise that fucking bunny and those bastard eggs. They ruined everything. Hollow. Fucking hollow as hell.
  • Jesus
    Sorry amount the swearing - tomorrow is not a good day for me. I think I have a bit of post traumatic stress and get flashbacks.

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