45% of Brits think Tesco is a poopermarket

Confirming what we have all long suspected, a Which? survey out today confirms that Tesco is Britain’s least popular supermarket - despite the fact that they lurk like Triffids on every street corner.

Scoring a pitiful 45% in a survey of 11,492 people, Tesco fared badly on everything from pricing, quality of produce and customer service.

Beating it soundly with an artisan baguette was Waitrose, which had a customer satisfaction score of 82%. But for those who can’t afford all that insufferable unwaxed lemons middle class stuff, the good news is that discount supermarkets Aldi and Lidl came second and third - with 74% and 69% respectively.

Also, Aldi and Lidl were the only stores to get four-star ratings for their pricing, with a massive 97% saying they were great value.

A spokeswoman from Tesco said: ‘Just you wait – as soon as we get rid of all this horsemeat, we’re opening a branch in your frontal lobe.’ (Probably.)


  • Darren
    most of the people who fill out these kind of things are either bottom of the barrel jobless benefit claimers (Aldi/Lidl shoppers) and the snobbish money grabbing old bags (Waitrose shoppers) who have more time on their hands than anything else.
  • Han S.
    They are shit though
  • Sicknote
    Really, only 45% of people think Tesco are shit - I stopped shopping there about 3 years ago because they build stores without planning permission; the force farmers into bankruptcy to name just a couple of things. I should declare that I am a shareholder of Tesco and I do enjoy my dividend.
  • Captain W.
    I think it's the dog's bollocks. Or similar.
  • matron
    The produce one is a bit unfair 'cos Asda is shittest on that front. Really low quality garbage that's not especially cheaper than anyone else. The only thing their rotten food is good for is throwing in the face of its hunchbacked employees.
  • annabelle w.
    I boycott tesco because of there appalling customer service. I tried to return a kindle which was 1 day out of warrenty and they were not interested. Amazon replaced it without problem because I registred it a week after it was purchased.
  • Milky
    I shop at waitrose & fucking love un-waxed lemons, I have bags of money & spare time... besides frittering away my spare time here I enjoy dipping lemons in wax & leaving them in fruit bags of "lesser" supermarkets.
  • Mr M.
    @sicknote there's no such thing as a poor farmer.
  • chewbacca
    @Mr Miagi Nail on the fucking head. Fed up hearing of all these hard up farmers. My heart bleeds when they can barely afford to replace their Range Rovers each year. @Fannybelle Fuckstaff Learn the difference between "there" and "their" you cretinous bitch. Or, if that's too hard, put your head in an oven at 250 degrees for a week. Stupid fucking cow.
  • CaptainYank
    @CaptainWank More likely to be the horse's bollocks not dog's
  • Han S.
    @Fannybelle Fuckstaff It was out of warrEnty? Well there/their/thier/thes your problem

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