"When I grow up I want to be a cheerleading development officer..."
Pressure group the Taxpayer’s Alliance have used freedom of information legislation to highlight some of the, shall we say, ‘less than necessary’ jobs that local councils spunk millions of pounds of public money on every year. Here, we attempt to defend three of our favourites…
3: TOOTHBRUSH FAIRY – as employed by Falkirk Council, a part time post for someone to visit nurseries and teach the under-5s how to brush their teeth properly. Good stuff; it’s a difficult skill and you can’t expect an ordinary nursery teacher to be able to do this as part of their job. What if they teach the kids to put the wrong end of the toothbrush in? Or worse still, a bread knife? What price the lives of our little ones?
2: BEFRIENDING COORDINATOR – there’s a lot of this sort of thing about, in Edinburgh and Kirklees to name but two places. Again, a vital role as not everyone has a friend and they can sometimes be hard to find. Especially if you’re one of those people who chooses not to bathe for weeks at a time. Or if you keep more than 40 cats in your tiny flat. Or if you’re Barry George. Would he have got himself into that big Jill Dando-shaped mess if he’d had access to a befriending coordinator? Arguably not.
1: CHEERLEADING DEVELOPMENT OFFICER – Falkirk again, where they’re DEFINITELY not wasting the money of the council tax payers. Cheerleading has always been a vital part of sport, but there has to be someone who will help cheerleaders to bridge that gap between just picking up some pom poms and correctly spelling out the name of the team. The RIGHT team, not the opposition or a team that aren’t even involved in the game. Give me an F. Give me an U. Give me an C. Give me a K. Give me a W. Give me an I. Give me a T. Give me an S. What have you got? FALKIRK COUNCIL!!