What's that smell? Why, it's unemployed graduates of course...

5 August 2013

A student, yesterday

It’s official – unemployment stinks. Or at least that’s the conclusion drawn by research carried out by the good people at The Grocer magazine.

They’ve found that seven per cent of young men have stopped using deodorant at least once a week. Eeeewwww.

What’s more, the reason behind this plummet in cleanliness is said to be rising graduate unemployment. No job = no reason to make yourself smell nice in the morning and protect yourself from sweating throughout the day. Again, eeewwww.

The survey also showed that a further 5% of men aged 17 to 24 have stopped washing their hair and 5% have given up styling their hair at least once a week.

Samuel Hart, an analyst for Kantar, who came up with the stats, said ‘The core driver for using deodorant as part of a routine is getting ready for work. Unemployment removes this.’ Once more, eeeewwww.

There’s also been a drop in the value sales of razors over the past year, but we’re putting that down to the inexplicable rise in popularity of beards. Worn mainly by arseholes.

TOPICS:   Government


  • shiftynifty
    So beard =Equals poor...excellent...too many of them...can do that pointedy thing now....now where is my razor..
  • Spencer
    Andy - Your obvious anti beard stance can only be explained by 1 of 2 things; your inability to grow and wear facial hair or the fact you were made to dress as a little girl and dance for the amusement of your bearded 'uncle' and his bearded friends as a boy. Or both. Either way, once you sport a beard, you realise that when it comes to beards, you only respect and take the opinion of others with beards. As you don't, I suggest you hush - and let us wiser, considered and mature manly men talk...
  • shiftynifty
    Spencer...beards are the the illusion of maturity
  • Spencer
    Proper manly beards are only grown by those old enough to... A full beard is a sign of age and with that - wisdom. They are as real a sign of maturity as it is able to get...
  • jt
    "They’ve found that seven per cent of young men have stopped using deodorant at least once a week." What does this mean? Does it mean they don't use deodorant at all during a week, or, on one or more day during the week they don't use deodorant? Equally, this: "5% of men aged 17 to 24 have stopped washing their hair and 5% have given up styling their hair at least once a week."
  • jiggle
    In some countries people with beards are considered untrustworthy because bearded people must be trying to hide something.
  • Grammar N.
    Never trust a man with a beard, or a woman without one.
  • Mustapha S.
    Well done Jiggle, you've now started a fatwah
  • Chewbie
    Flex wit da erb
  • Mike O.
    Behind Chuck Norris' beard there isnt a chin, only another fist.
  • Dick
    What does stopped washing their hair mean? Does it mean they don't wash it, or that they don't use shampoo to wash it? Loads of people no longer use shampoo to wash their hair, instead relying on their own naturally body-produced oils.
  • Dr B.
    Hi Andy I would be very interested to know if you could tell us what percentage of recent graduates "5% of men aged 17 to 24" represents and also if the 5% who have stopped washing their hair is the same 5% who have also given up styling it. Are you also able to give us the figures for women and for the control group, those who never started to wash or style their hair in the first place ? You know, just to make it look like you haven't quoted a completely made up stat. Thanks Love Brian.
  • ryouga
    Interesting, I shower every day and dont like to leave the house without doing so but then again I have never been one to be metrosexual and have those silly hairstyles and beauty products I just wash myself and brush hair
  • noshit
    My arsehole has had a beard around it for decades. He groomed it then fucked it.
  • Jose L.
    Yes Dick, those are the loads of people that civilised human beings refer to as smelly trash that should be exterminated for the good, and entertainment, of the human race.

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