Man mutilates self in order to carry out weak iPod stunt

port-ipodwrist-420x0 We’re not going to lie to you – it’s been a slow news day. Mind you, we like to think we’ve always got time and space to bring you foolishness such as this – the tale of a man who has just invented the ‘strapless watch’ by fastening his iPod to his wrist.

‘I just invented the strapless watch’ says professional body piercer Dave Hurban, possibly with a big dopey look on his face. But how did he do it? Why, he mapped out the four corners of his iPod on his skin and then inserted four titanium studs into his arm. After the skin had healed, Dave was able to magnetically fix the iPod on his wrist, making him the best man in the world or something.

Look – there’s even a YouTube video that shows you how to do it (although it probably isn’t for the squeamish among you). Dave Hurban – crazy name, crazy guy.


  • Darren
    slow news day? I actually thought that was quite a good story for once, don't put your selves down like that! remember the 666 chip.... he is on his way....
  • ooo
    Big FAIL
  • Me
    Perfect until Apple replace that model of ipod with a shiny new one in a years time and he's left with 4 studs in the wrong places for the new ipod. Its that or someone just nicks it of course.
  • Rob
    I am experimenting with large magnets and a positively charged fox.
  • Will
    What happens when he needs to charge it? What a dick
  • luke
    Will, He will probably just take it off and charge it? its a magnet.
  • Betty S.
    WTF is dis real?
  • Boris
    Seeing this gentleman in the street I would sadly assume that, due to his tattoos, he is a bit of a tosser. Thanks to the article though now I can be certain that he is and not feel bade about judging people from appearances. With a simple hammer and 8 inch nail he could have nailed it directly to his forehead and reduced the risk of it falling off. I'd even do do it for him, the publicity seeking cunt. Of course he's going to have to have a wire running all the way from his arm to his ears which will probably get tangled when he moves his arm about rendering his brilliant idea more awkward than wearing it using the clip to attach it to his shirt. Although, I could thread the wires through his radial artery using a knitting needle I suppose. On this occasion I defer to Mike Hock when he says 'iPod wearing cock top'.
  • Tom
    Good thing he is wearing gloves, would hate for him to cut himself and give himself an infection.
  • Oliverreed
    What a cunt
  • Dick
    @Rob I am experimenting with large magnets and a positively charged fox. You don't need it charged, you just need to stick some ferrous metal into its anus.
  • DragonChris
  • Hugh G.
    He's ruined that lovely tattoo.
  • Mr C.
    Guess where his headphone jack is...Next move, fitting a subwoofer up his arse!!
  • Le-dong
  • Science
    titanium isn't magnetic...
  • Mike H.
    ^^ 4 Titanium studs with ferrous inserts you tit-head. ^^
  • iMan
    You think that's impressive. I implanted an iPad up my arse. How come I don't get a fucking article?

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