HotUKDeals Of The Day - Tuesday 26th May
Thanks to HotUKDeals, here’s some stuff you can confuse and bribe them with as you bid to survive the rest of the week before you hand them back over to the ailing school system, who will recommence their futile efforts at knocking some sense into the little blighters.
Firstly, baffle and bemuse them with a big box of how it used to be when you were younger. Namely, a box set of Paddington Bear episodes, the ones that used to be on at tea time on BBC1, with 56 episodes all for £9.95.
The slow-pacing and gentle storylines will addle the fevered mind of your average 21st century kid, possibly lulling them into a semi-coma and making life much easier for yourself and them.
Next, a bookular treat for the younger ones. It’s ‘How Cats Really Work’ by Alan Snow. A spoof information book, it asks the questions, “What is a cat's sinister mission on earth?” “Where do cats go at night?” and “Why do dogs dislike cats so much?”
It’s very funny and can be had for just £2.99, which is much less than you’d pay for a real cat. Maybe it’ll help you wise up as to why they’re such evil, self-serving little bastards – a lot like children!
Finally, if all of that fails, and there’s no way of controlling the rampaging child monkeys that are blighting your week, just bung a bag of Haribo Tangfastics in their direction – you can get a big bag for just 50p.
Right, take yourself off to bed then. It’ll be 5am soon, and they’ll be waking up, spilling stuff all over the kitchen, colouring in the walls and tying fireworks to the dog’s tail.
(deals found by amibees, andywedge and kerri_<3_bargain)