HotUKDeals Of The Day - Thursday 2nd September
Don’t mind those people over there – they’ve been beavering away at HotUKDeals, sniffing out the bargains for us all.
Despite what the so-called television ‘funnymen’ like Bill Oddie and Roy Walker might say, there’s nothing wrong at all with supermarket clothing. It’s well made, it’s durable, it’s got a vague whiff of style about it sometimes and you can always wash your windows with it when it’s fucked.
All reasons why the announcement of a sale of Tesco’s finest garb is a cause for mass celebration. Skilfully use various codes and you can get up to 40% off and some cashback as well. Now won’t you look all lovely?
On a far more serious note, we move on to teeth. Possibly man’s deadliest natural weapon (with the talon coming a close second), it is believed that we have over 50,000 uses for our teeth, compared to just 7 for our toothless gums.
So children, look after your gnashers. You can do that and save some cash by partaking in a high-profile dental sale that’s going on right now. ‘Half price’ is what they’re roaring through their clenched pearly whites. Get on it.
Do you hate your beautiful, shining teeth? Are you afraid to smile because they're so bloody perfect? Have you smashed up all your mirrors in case you accidentally get a glimpse of them? Well do something about it you damn fool!
You could start by investing in some of this Asda Loaded Black Forest ice cream. It's normally £2.47 for a 480ml tub but right now it's only 50p. The wizards at HotUKDeals haven't comfirmed whether it's a nationwide offer or not but we can all dream until they do. Death to teeth!
(deals found by HUKD members Southern Bride, vadis and adamrwood)