Send someone a 'mystery potato'
Well, they might if they hear about this baffling service where you can order a spud with a message written on by hand, by someone who has a felt-tip.
The site, Mystery Potato, allows you to order a personalise potato, which you send with a message on it, for around £5. Of course, you could just buy a bag of spuds down the shops, write on them yourself, and throw them at someone's house, if you prefer.
Through this website, you can choose between a sweet potato or jacket potato, and tap in your message, and the company will fix it up for you, and send it anonymously to the object of your affections. No. Honestly. This is actually happening.
Jeff Kelly and Jim Owens, the people behind this venture, say that "potatoes are simple and they bring joy and confusion like you would not believe."
"In these days of email, tweets, Snapchat, and Facebook messenger, sending someone something in the mail is starting to have a renewed power and impact - potatoes are just the thing to send in the mail."
Now, imagine the horror of opening up a package and finding a cold, cooked potato in there. Knowing the postal services, it'd be more like mashed potato too. Anyway, if you want in, you know what to do.