If you buy one, I'll find you and hurt you

4 November 2008

Nope. We're just not getting the point of this. It's bad enough that somewhere along the way, the Germans convinced us that dragging a dead tree through the house was a good idea. Bloody Germans. When we got wise to the incomprehensibleness of it all, we were then tricked to buying a fake dead tree and parading that in the living room for a month. A fake dead tree. Nonsense. Now John Lewis present you with the opportunity to own this:

That's a reversable fake dead tree, then. So not only do you have a tree in your house, not only is it fake, but it's not even pretending to be growing out the ground. Just to rub it in your face. What more could possibly be done to make a tree appear less real? Well, they could paint it black, couldn't they? So they have. Perhaps next year they can make it from jam and feathers, just so there's not one shred of doubt remaining that isn't a tree.

How much could John Lewis possibly ask you to cough up for this fake-in-every-way waste of time and space? Why, a paltry £75 to you, madam.

Get out.

TOPICS:   Christmas

2 comments

  • Bored
    This is nothing new, 'upside down' tree's have been around for the last couple of years and (for reasons unknown) sold quite well from the likes of B&Q, Tesco, Homebase etc last year.
  • HotUKDeals B.
    [...] it was just a week ago that Bitterwallet alerted you to the horror of the upside down Christmas tree, available for an ice-cold £75 from John Lewis. A [...]

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