What a lot of bankery

Poor Lloyds TSB. What with the banking crisis and the horsemeat debacle, those guys can’t get a break. And now this – the Co-op have pulled out of buying 632 Lloyds branches, citing – guess what? – the economic downturn.
The sale of the branches, called (in predictably wanky style) ‘Project Verde’, was ordered by European regulators as payment for being bailed out by the government when the financial crisis hit. It was intended to create more competition for Lloyds, who are now 39% owned by the government, as part of their equally wanky-sounding ‘Challenger’ initiative.

If the Co-op hadn’t backed down, Lloyds customers would have been given the option to switch to the Co-op, and it would have become the UK’s seventh biggest bank. But despite saying it would buy the branches in 2012, the Co-op has gone off the idea, saying it would affect their members’ returns. Where that leaves the Co-op bank on the high street is anyone’s guess. Will they pull out and just concentrate on funerals and half price Mr Kipling’s French Fancies?

Now Lloyds will try to sell the branches as a stand alone bank – but in the meantime the branches will operate as TSB. And these people get paid millions in bonuses to shuffle stuff about and change their minds and call things ‘Project Verde Challenge.’

How about opening the Bank of Fun, where instead of money you get some balloons and a nice sit down? And a cash machine that gives you free biscuits? It would make more sense than any of this.


  • Noghar
    I was a LloydsTSB customer, and they weren't going to offer me the choice of staying with Lloyds or being sold to the Co-Op. When they sold the branches they sold the accounts and customers too, or customers like me would have left in droves. As it happens I switched banks anyway. The CO-Op also got cold feet because their banking arm lost £600m last year, so only a total idiot or the CEO of the RBoS would propose expanding now.
  • Dacouch
    Lucky escape for Lloyd's customer, Co-op took over my local shop and then doubled the price of everything. It's poorly run with bad stock control and getting served takes ages.
  • shiftynifty
    Co-op...chicanery of the corner shop...got a leaflet through the letterbox , with having a asda , tescos, sainsburys, morrisons, and the westfield on my doorstep they are still a no-go...fucking prices even on offer are not the shizzle
  • shiftynifty
    Oh and Lucy...your still sweet
  • Captain W.
    @shifty You do realise Lucy is probably Andy Dawson in a wig don't you, as he seems to rarely post articles these days? @BW, why has my IP address been blocked, and not even an email to explain why I've offended you, because I for one don't get it? I never paid attention to the BW/HUKD-bashing that went on before, but now I can start to understand...
  • Euan
    Not Lloyds' fault as it's the EU insisting they flog off the branches I spose, but having been a loyal Lloyds customer since I was at uni (and they didn't dick me about in the meantime), having been told I was being sold off to some other bugs... I jumped ship to an internet based bank which has UK call centres.. and now wondering why I didn't do that ages ago!
  • Daisy D.
    I was with RBoS until they had to flog all their retail branches to Santander. Talk about frying pan/fire - I couldn't dump them fast enough.
  • Englebert.Humperdinck
    "I was with RBoS until they had to flog all their retail branches to Santander. " that never ACTUALLY happened

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