Commercial Break: Uh oh, Purity Bear is back...

17 February 2012

Thinking about having some mad, thrusting rumpy-pumpy this weekend with someone who isn’t your spouse? Before you do (and you probably will), spare a thought for Purity Bear, back again in a sequel to his previous filthy fun-spoiling antics.

If you DO choose to do the horizontal sex-pump outside of wedlock, you will almost certainly break Purity Bear’s heart. And every time a bear’s heart is broken, a swan gets a sharp pain in its neck. And every time a swan gets a pain in its neck, a puffin explodes. And every time a puffin explodes, an angel is disfigured in a celestial chip pan fire. Is that what you want?

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6 comments

  • will
    "virgins who wait for marriage have a higher success rate." of what? premature ejaculation? p.s. that quote is NOT taken out of context.
  • Hidden N.
    No After Dinner Sex.
  • samuri
    Prick teasing bitch
  • Jeebus
    I still don't get it? Are blowjobs okay or not? 2 fucking videos and I still don't know!
  • Avon B.
    @ Jeebus They're fine. In fact a few more and these religious cretins might enjoy it, wake up and see reality.
  • Dick
    It would have been funnier if he had run her over then raped her dead corpse.

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