Commercial Break: Don't rub yourself up the wrong way with this unique towel

At first, we thought this was some kind of spoof by a gang of pranksty internet funsters. Then we assumed it was taken from an unscreened episode of The Apprentice – you know, the one they have early on in every series where the idiots make an advert.

Sadly, it turns out to be a true thing from a true product – the True Clean Towel. It’s your standard bath towel, but with a human body printed on it. The idea is that you use it as a guide when you’re drying yourself so that you don’t end up wiping your face with a part of the towel that you’ve previously used to wipe your ‘special private area’.

So then, what better way to illustrate this magical product than to... well, see for yourselves. Be warned - it isn't pretty.


  • Duke
    Does anybody actually dry their ‘special private area’ before their face? Common sense would say that you would dry your face first. This product surely solves a problem that doesn't exist?
  • Elvis P.
    I do..I always dry my gonads first, move on to the arschenholan, then onto the face, then a quick body wipe. In fact, I have a Shower, shit and shave.
  • issac h.
    As you've supposedly just washed all your bits, what the hell does it matter?
  • Rich
    ithout viewing, I suspect its your bog standard Arse/Face towel...wipe your face with the bit that says face on it and your arse with the bit that says arse on it...therefore next time you use the towel you dont wipe your face with the bit you previously wiped your arse with (when you had a bath the previous week for example) ...seems to have been completely lost on the previous 3 posters lol
  • The B.
    Um, why would you dry your nether regions first? Surely everything above would just drip onto it? Or am I the only one that works their way down? As to Rich's comment, as issac says, it's all clean so where's the problem, unless of course you use your towel to get those stubborn clagnuts out?
  • james d.
    My girlfriend doesn't seem to mind
  • Alexis
    Why does the white man have black man's feet and ankles?
  • poo p.
    Wiping my arse and bollocks on a towel then wiping it all over my face is the only way I get to sample the wonderfull experience I provide for my wife when I sit on her face.... without it I'd just be missing out, which doesn't seem fair to me?
  • a c.
    That's where my balls are.
  • -]
    Rich - I'm not sure it would matter, I mean surely you will have washed your towels in the intervening week? Although I still wouldn't dry my face AFTER my arse. Just because you have got clean doesn't mean there isn't bacteria living there (that should be there/beneficial) that you would want on your face.

What do you think?

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