If you’ve come here looking for outrageously cheap fruits and vegetables, outrageously cheap and funny DVDs and outrageously cheap music vouchers, you could be in luck.

However, if you’ve come here looking for booze, fags and low-grade soft porn, you need the newsagents at the end of the street. HotUKDeals can’t help you. Sorry.

One of the top supermarkets isn’t just cutting prices, it’s taking them into the garden, nailing them to the fence and then brutally hacking them apart with a chainsaw. And hacking some of the parts of the fence too. It’s wild.

This week, you’ll be able to get each of the following for only 30p – a bag of pears, a big bag of British potatoes, a big bag of carrots or a bag/net of onions. And don’t get us started on the ‘buy one get two free’ deals (large king prawns, Phileas Fogg crisps.) Wowsers!

One of the greatest and most popular American sitcoms of all time is Seinfeld and if you’ve never had the pleasure of it, then you should think carefully for about, ooh, a second before indulging in this, a special edition DVD box set of the whole thing… for only £34.95.

You’ll get all nine complete series of the show as well as an exclusive bonus disc featuring an hour-long roundtable with the four key cast members and co-creator Larry David. If that’s not enough, there’s even a 226-page coffee table book, created by the cast and crew, chronicling the show. Phew.

Finally, a recurring favourite at HotUKDeals – free iTunes stuff. This is an offer that could see you reel in 2 x £15 iTunes vouchers for the paltry sum of just £20. You can spend it on music, apps, TV shows, iTattoos, whatever.

We’d personally recommend the latest albums by The Shower Hawks, X-Futamondo, The Billion Dollar Binheads, Steve Fartz, A Kind Of Chisel, Got Yer Noggin and Stan Ridgway. Although some of you might find some of that stuff a bit populist. Cor!

(deals found by HUKD members LightningPete, nicster08, amibees and starkey)

Happy birthday to comedy genius Larry David, who is 62 today. In case you’re baffled by who Larry David is, he’s only the creator of two of the greatest American sitcoms of the past two decades, Seinfeld and Curb Your Enthusiasm.

He’s also a proudly bald man, and that’s what led him to record this appeal advert for cancer research last year – he explains here how cancer has changed his life. As with every great episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm, let’s just say that Larry’s standpoint and order of priorities could be seen as somewhat askew from the rest of society. What a man. Happy birthday you miserable old goat.

The time is now. It’s just you and us and the only thing we’ve got in common is that we’re hungry. Hungry for bargains. Maybe you’re hungry for fried chicken. We’re fine thanks, we’ve just had a sandwich.

Satiate your desire for savings now, as the good folk from HotUKDeals serve up a veritable feast of steaming bargain pie. As well as some of that fried chicken you keep going on about. God, you’re OBSESSED!

First up is one that has been touted as the ‘deal of the century’ – intriguing, no? It’s certainly one to get your teeth into if you’re a fan of KFC and their buckets of dinner-flavoured foods.

We don’t quite follow how it works but the gist of it is that you can get lots of chicken, lots of chips and lots of fizzy pop drink for about £13. Which according to the HUKD members is A Good Thing. Click here and you can also get some info about how KFC are allegedly the kings of chicken cruelty. You pays your money, you takes your chicken torture etc etc…

Cheap software alert! Now you can download Microsoft Office 2007 for just £8.95 or buy a boxed version for only £13. A price so low that reading about it might have just caused you to faint and bang your head against the fireplace.

Good move. In order to qualify, you need to be an NHS member of staff with an NHS email address. Now where can you meet people like that? In hospitals of course. So if you didn’t injure yourself when you saw the low price, try some light self-harming and get down to A&E. Befriend a doctor and you could soon be in Cheapsoftwaresville.

Lastly, some genuine advice. If you don’t have seasons 5 and 6 of Seinfeld on DVD, your life simply isn’t complete yet. But don’t panic – we can save you and make you better.

20+ episodes per box set featuring arguably the greatest sitcom ever made – and 5 and 6 were the seasons when it really hit its stride. Yours for just £4.44 each! Unbelievable. They should be giving them away to help keep people warm in the winter. Here’s some classic Seinfeld moments (including Jerry dealing with some stinking customer service.)

(deals found by acecatcher3, gary189 and MrNiceMan)