Posts Tagged ‘ebay’

Do you want a free pass to heaven? You’re in luck

February 14th, 2014 1 Comment By Mof Gimmers

PythonGod 300x225 Do you want a free pass to heaven? Youre in luckDo you believe in God? Are you one of those people that doesn’t really believe, but is worried about the off-chance that there might be something higher than us, so you’d like to keep your spiritual toe in because you’d rather be in heaven than hell?

Well, you don’t have to worry about being moral or good anymore because you can by a heavenly favour from eBay, thanks to one selfless soul.

You can now bid on a ‘credit in heaven’. Buying your way into the choir invisible? That’s what Masons do, so why not avoid all that knee-tickling nonsense and idly win an internet auction instead, while scratching your arse in front of the telly?

The listing says: “I have, from time to time, done voluntary work for a Christian church. The pastor has told me that my work has earned me credit in heaven.”

“I’m not a Christian, and I don’t think I’ll get to heaven, so I would like to sell my credit to someone who can use it.”

“I can’t give any details about how much credit there is, or how to claim it, but I am assured that it’s a very good thing to have.”

So there you have it. Win this bid, and you don’t have to worry about going to church, Christenings, prayer, being nice to anyone, not murdering, your inevitable suicide attempts or any of that rubbish because, if you win this, you’ll already be on God’s good side.

Feel free to bid right here, amen,

Buy yourself a cheap date for Valentine’s Day

February 11th, 2014 5 Comments By Thewlis
dateauction 300x300 Buy yourself a cheap date for Valentine’s Day

a charity case, yesterday

14th February is just around the corner (it’s on Friday, in case you need reminding). A day when singletons everywhere sing Eric Carmen and cry into their pillows. Unless you are an enterprising young lady from London that is.

“Brave” Hope Anscomb has auctioned the opportunity to take her out on a date on Friday. It’s a win win win situation- she gets a date, a similarly desperate young man (or young woman) also gets a date and Hope’s chosen charity (the Autism Trust) gets a wodge of cash.

In addition to a free meal at an Italian restaurant in central London, paid for by Ms Anscomb, the lucky winner can expect:

“Charm and wit (majority will be charm)

The chance to brag to your mates that you did something stupid and all in the name of charity

An honorary mention in my blog(!!) and my upmost respect for the rest of your days”

How can you resist?

Hope told The Evening Standard: “I am actually getting quite nervous… when I spoke to my friends and family they said I was insane.”

Interested parties may be dismayed to discover that Hope’s auction has now ended, with a final selling price of £621. Nevertheless, some other lonely women have jumped on the bandwagon,  at a bargain 99p start, so whether you like Thai models in Hull *, or pink cupcakes in Coventry, get yourself a smashing Valentine’s deal…

* caveat emptor. Thai model describes herself as ‘used’.

bitcoin 300x197 eBay opens up a new category for non existent coinsEver wanted to be a virtual millionaire? Well now the UK’s favourite online auction site can help you pursue your dreams, with a new ‘virtual currency’ category scheduled to go live on 10th February.

Bitcoins have gained massively in both popularity and value recently, but much like anything else, bu the time it’s popular, is there any room to make money. eBay certainly seem to think so. The new category will be a classified-ad only item, meaning that eBay ‘purchases’ are not binding, but merely a way of introducing buyers to sellers online. A bit like Bitcoin Dating.

For now at least, the new category will only be available on eBay UK, presumably while the bosses upstairs ponder on whether this will be big for eBay, or whether the only people interested in buying are happy to frequent geekish Bitcoin fora in shady places on the  net.

Still, the UK is an interesting choice for a launch, given the current furore and confusion over the tax treatment of Bitcoins in the UK, not least whether those selling them ought to account for 20% VAT (once minimum thresholds are surpassed). It might have been easier to launch on the German eBay site, where the treatment of Bitcoins is more clear. For now, anyway.

So will you be picking up  few Bitcoins with your children’s clothes on eBay, or do they belong on a black market somewhere, rather than on a red, blue, yellow and green one?

Would you like a £250 gift card for Starbucks that actually costs £280? If someone offered you that, you would spit gingerbread latte in their face and complain to Lynn Faulds Wood, wouldn’t you?

gold card 300x200 Comically lousy Starbucks gift card sells out in seconds

Well, it seems that some people are so dumb that they’re happy to fork out extra for the new rose gold coloured Starbucks’ gift card. Created by Starbucks and sold by, this year’s limited edition card sold out in 6 SECONDS.

Retailing for $450, the cards only contain $400 of credit. Which means that the 1000 people who bought it paid $50 for a piece of rectangular plastic with Starbucks written on it.

Starbucks defended the stupid card by saying: ’It costs us more than $50 to produce this card. That’s what you’re paying for – the quality of the card itself.’

Ooh, a lovely quality plastic card. Just what everyone wants for Christmas. Oh, and it also comes with ‘Gold Level’ perks, which is Starbucks-speak for ‘a free shot of crappy syrup.’

Obviously, the world being as it is, limited edition cards from last year are selling on eBay for $1001, and one seller is demanding over 4 grand for cards from 2012 and 2013.

Make. It. Stop.

Now you can buy from eBay- at Argos

September 24th, 2013 3 Comments By Thewlis

ebay new logo 300x160 Now you can buy from eBay  at ArgoseBay have come under fire recently- not just for charging ever-higher fees, both directly and through eBay-owned Paypal, but also for charging final value fees on the cost of postage. As if that wasn’t expensive enough. But alongside the added costs, are eBay actually trying to develop a better service for eBay shoppers as well?

The new partnership with Argos will allow shoppers to ‘click and collect’ their eBay purchases from a local Argos store, instead of waiting for a while-you-were-out card from the postman and queueing on a Saturday morning at the sorting office. With 740 stores, and many of them open after office hours, this could be a far more convenient way of getting your internet crap really important purchase home.

But before you get too excited, the scheme is initially being run as a trial, for six months (so we get Christmas in), in 150 Argos stores and with just 50 as-yet unnamed eBay sellers. It is in no way a direct response to the surprisingly successful Amazon Lockers programme.

Devin Wenig, president of eBay said “We know from our data and our experience around the world, consumers love choice and this will given them an entirely new option for thousands of items that previously could not be delivered in this way,”

“This is a snippet of what is going to happen all around the world,” he added,  mysteriously.

While some might ponder why Argos would want to get into bed with a company who is potentially stealing some of their business, MD John Walden pooh-poohed this idea, suggesting they were a natural partner in this venture as they invented (“pioneered”) the click and collect (or as they like to call it, check and reserve) idea in 2000, and it now forms 33% of their business. He also revealed that Argos is looking forward to the “opportunity for increased customer footfall.”

As well as this announcement, eBay also revealed plans to test a one-hour delivery service in London some time in 2014, but had no other details as yet. However, those in the know might surmise a UK-copy of the US ‘eBay Now’ programme available in New York and San Francisco which allows products bought through eBay from ToysRUs, Urban Outfitters, The Home Depot and some local stores to be delivered within about 60 minutes of ordering for a $5 charge.

Still, once all these new services come online, perhaps eBay will decide to put its fees up. Again.

Is eBay pricing itself out of the market?

August 12th, 2013 62 Comments By Thewlis

ebay new logo 300x160 Is eBay pricing itself out of the market?When eBay first burst into our lives in the late 90s, we all thought it was the answer to our clutter prayers. The premise was simple- now you could get rid of tat you didn’t want anymore and someone would actually pay you for it. It was also a great way to declutter, provided you didn’t start buying other people’s tat at the same time.

Last week, eBay announced another change to their seller fees, which will make selling on eBay even more expensive. So will this be a nail in the coffin of the massive eBay machine, or will people still cough up regardless?

The new changes, which come into force on 4 September will see eBay charging its final value fees (FVF) including postage, instead of the item value alone. For private sellers this amount is normally around 10% on the final selling value of the item, and for business sellers it ranges from 5-12%, but is 10% as standard. Besides being another way to squeeze even more fees out of sellers, eBay might claim to be doing this to stop people profiting out of inflated postage costs.

While this may have been possible, and even prevalent some years ago, with postage costs increasing massively over the last few years, and specifically the huge increases to Royal Mail parcel costs earlier this year, when this is coupled with eBay imposed maxima on the amount of postage that can be charged on an item, sellers would be hard pressed to make much of a turn on postage these days anyway. Not that eBay is charging on the profit- the FVF will apply to the whole postage cost, most or all of which will presumably be spent on postage.

But what can sellers do? For most people who sell occasionally on eBay, the effect will not be so great as for traders who attempt to make a living using eBay as an online shop venue. But the proliferation of selling sites on Facebook might mean that sellers are willing to accept a slightly lower price in order to keep 100% of the sales value. Even if you do have to deal with actual people.

On the same date, and presumably aimed at placating smaller business sellers, eBay are increasing the amount of ‘free’ fixed-price listing fees (a smaller fee paid on listing the item) for basic shop owners, up to 200 from 20 per month, saving up to £20 a month based on 10p listing fees. Basic shops cost £19.99 a month.

And don’t forget, you have also been paying Paypal fees on the final value including postage for years. Some sellers are surprised at just how little they end up with in their pocket at the end of the day.

But will this be enough to turn people away from eBay? Many online sellers have given up when faced with eBay fees, but for many more, the costs may be high, but the practicality of a standalone online shop in a sea of millions of websites may be too high. Sellers said they would boycott eBay after the sellers’ right to negative feedback was revoked, but so far eBay still seems to be surviving. Perhaps this latest change is just an added inflationary cost of surviving these days.

Outsider artists are difficult to find, but when you do, they’re to be treasured. Why? Well, in the case of this particular artist, they’ve decided to paint children’s TV weed, Orville the Duck, with the face of child-botherer, Gary Glitter.

And it gets weirder.

gary glitter Can you find a more peculiar painting that the Gary Glitter/Duck In A Nappy one?

The artist says: “painting is 24″x45″ painted on hardboard, framed in pine, with real teeth, and drilled out eyes (you can fill these holes with l.e.d. lights or raisins)”

Real teeth! Raisin eyes!

And there’ll be more from the grotesque gallery. The artist continues: ”i am having a big spring clear out – so i’ll be putting up loads more of my paintings on ebay every day, so do please come back and check out other original paintings i am selling.”

It is currently going for just over a fiver on eBay. Click here if you want to buy it.

Small third party traders who use Amazon to shift their secondhand books/vacuum cleaners/novelty Lionel ‘Rich Tea’ mugs, are fuming with the mega retailer, who is hiking its selling fees from 7% to 12% after Easter.

Screen shot 2010 12 22 at 15.03.25 Third party sellers enraged about Amazon’s new fees

The price rises are causing much distress, but so powerful is Amazon that the smaller traders feel powerless to defend themselves. One UK trader said that he was worried the fees would destroy his small business, but there was no arguing with the might of the online company, which last year boasted worldwide sales of $21.3bn.

Amazon is becoming something of a retail Godzilla, chomping up the high street and destroying businesses. They’re also, of course, sidestepping paying tax in Britain by registering all their UK sales in Luxembourg. (Which is what Godzilla would have done too, if he knew anything about accountancy.)

But small third party traders make up an important part of Amazon’s success, with 2 million traders using the network worldwide.

So will this price rise cause small retailers move back to ebay instead, or are we all Amazon’s bitches now?

ebay new logo 300x160 Selling gig tickets on eBay? Watch out for Elengo Papacostas...Ticket sellers on eBay have been scammed by a mysterious figure called Elengo Papacostas, who has purchased festival tickets from them and sneaked the money back using PayPal.

Elengo -who I like to imagine as a dark handsome type in a fedora carrying a guitar case in the desert – doesn’t exist on the UK Electoral roll, but he’s still managed to con people who have been selling festival tickets online.

The scam is as follows: Elengo snaps up your gig tickets using PayPal. Some time later, he/it/them orders a ‘chargeback’ on the payment, which is the facility you can use to get your money back if your goods don’t arrive or are unsatisfactory.

After a BBC Wales documentary exposed the scam, they got a reply from someone claiming to be Elengo, who complained that he received the tickets and it was PayPal’s fault. The plot thickens…

With dozens of victims taking to the Internet to complain about the fraud, PayPal has since closed Elengo’s account. But don’t be surprised if he springs up in another guise. If Stelios Shufflebottom or Regina Felangi contacts you wanting to buy Glastonbury tickets, report it to the eBay police, OK?

Collector’s item? Neigh, surely not…

February 13th, 2013 2 Comments By Andy Dawson

Don’t think we’ll see this turning up on the Antiques Roadshow in decades to come, unless someone’s got space in their freezer and a lot of patience…

BC NMC7CIAAaLP6 500x498 Collectors item? Neigh, surely not...


uk money Now eBay and Ikea are shown to be taking advantage of lax tax laws...Last week it was Starbucks, today it’s eBay and Ikea that are wriggling under the ‘fair tax spotlight’ – a spotlight that we’ve just made up, although it seems like it might be a pretty harsh spotlight, and not the kind that someone might sing a ballad beneath. Of course, we’ve already had Starbucks quivering under the spotlight, as it has paid no UK tax in the past three years in spite of the fact that it’s chalked up £1.2 billion in sales in that period. Hmmm…

Now it’s emerged that eBay channels payments through Luxembourg and Switzerland and manages to avoid paying as much as £50 million in tax while it does so. Ikea avoids some UK tax by sending payments abroad to a sister payment, which it calls a ‘franchise fee’. Hmmm…

In a Sunday Times report, it was revealed that eBay had paid little more than £1m in corporation tax even though it had racked up sales of around £800m a year. As for Starbucks, on Saturday, the taxpayer was footing the bill for the police to protect London branches of Starbucks which had been threatened by marchers on the demonstration against government cuts. Now there’s ironic.

Additionally, it looks as though Amazon is only paying 3% VAT to Luxembourg on ebooks while insisting that publishers knock the UK VAT rate of 20% off cost price, ramping up its profits even more. Classy – and of course Amazon have got form when it comes to dodging its UK tax responsibilities.

So, what about you lot? Do you give a toss about what companies get up to with their accounts as long as they’re illegal? Why should a company pay more to the HMRC if they don’t have to? Social responsibility – what’s all that about? Or are you in favour of boycotting these scoundrels unless they get their act together and stop acting like slippery eels?

KGrHqJlIFBKuklS 0BQZHKwfq6g60 57 223x300 For sale: 50 Shades Of Grey   pre fingered by MILFsStill haven’t bought yourself a copy of 50 Shades Of Grey? Why not treat yourself to a special version of it – one that’s been, erm, well-thumbed by Samantha, Allison and Sona, three self-styled ‘MILFY Brooklyn Babes’, who are flogging it on eBay to the highest-bidding pervert.

“Passed from one friend to another, we each made our way through the tantalising first installment in the Fifty Shades trilogy,” they declare, without going into any more detail, which may or may not be a blessing for all of us.

The trio describe themselves as, “(three) tragically hip mothers and best friends. We share everything from clothes to babysitting duties, so naturally we all had our way with this book. We each tremendously enjoyed reading this single copy of Fifty Shades of Grey. We want you, dear bidder, to enjoy this book as much as we did.” You can interpret that any way you want.

There’s six days left to stake your claim, but you’ll have to beat the current high bid of $145.50 (£90).

Anyone fancy getting a fiver off something on eBay before 10pm tonight? Course you do.

If you’re paying with Paypal, use the coupon code COUPONFROMEBAY at checkout and receive £5 off your purchase (excluding P&P).

There’sno minimum spend but you have to use the code in one transaction. We’ve just tried it and it works. We bought one of these. £1.99 after the voucher.

 Deal Attack! Get £5.00 off an eBay purchase before 10pm tonight!

Nice eh? Thanks to avid HotUKDeals members dapp and pantheruncia…

The greatest eBay item of all time…?

March 27th, 2012 15 Comments By Andy Dawson

The title of the listing tells you everything you need to know – ‘Taxidermy: Wild Grey Super Squirrel’. Start the bidding at £14.99…

Screen Shot 2012 03 27 at 14.53.56 The greatest eBay item of all time...?